


Iron Women

by Ellana17



Series: I walked with you once upon a dream [3]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Captain America - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, F/F, Humor, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-09-29
Packaged: 2019-10-18 10:00:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 30,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17578754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ellana17/pseuds/Ellana17
Summary: Almost losing the company had been the kick in the ass Natasha had needed to get her life back together after leaving the Avengers. Not being Iron Woman anymore, Natasha had focused all her energy on being Natasha Stark, Head of Stark Industries. After years of struggle, Natasha was finally starting to heal.Or: Natasha Stark, genius, billionaire, philanthropist, trying to get her life back on tracks after leaving the Avengers





	1. Natasha

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this is an AU I've been working on focusing on Natasha Stark from Earth 3490. The story is not set on Earth 3490 though, and is kind of a mix between the MCU and the comics, hopefully it'll make more sense as the story goes on.

Natasha removed her high heels with a deep sigh of relief as soon as she crossed the workshop’s threshold. She dropped the designer shoes carelessly on the floor and wasted no time in getting behind the computer screen.

“How’s that simulation looking, Friday?” the woman asked.

The gala had run late and despite the late hour, Natasha was not tired. After all these years in the public eye, attending charity galas and award dinners, Natasha still had trouble calming down fast enough to be in bed at a decent hour. Not that the young woman was in the habit of getting a decent amount of sleep anyway.

Natasha’s favorite way of getting her mind to stop running wild had always been sex, of course. It was her way of letting out some steam. No commitment. No string attached. She had had no trouble finding attractive and wiling partners for a wild night in the sack over the years, when she felt like it. One of the reasons why Natasha was not getting a decent amount of sleep these days probably had to do with the fact that she had not had a single one-night stand in months.

“The simulation is nearly complete,” said the disembodied voice.

“Well, look at that,” Natasha exclaimed, surprised, as she leaned back against her desk chair. “I could have stayed there a bit longer after all.”

The recent memory of Justin Hammer pressing against her near the bar made her shudder in horror.

“Or maybe not,” she mumbled. “Friday, put on some music while we wait,” the woman added.

Natasha smoothed down her red evening dress and frowned at the loose thread she saw there. She twisted it around her finger absent-mindedly. She snapped her fingers distractedly, clapped the side of her fist against her open palm, sighed, made the desk chair roll a bit to the left, a bit to the right, and drummed her fingers against the armrest.

The woman looked around the workshop, taking in the high-tech equipment, the computer screens, the bots watching her silently from the other side of the room. Her eyes quickly traveled over the grey primitive suit that still stood proudly behind a glass window after all those years. Her gaze stopped on Dum-E who was stretching its single mechanical arm pitifully.

“You okay over there?” she asked.

Natasha’s body was starting to get numb as it often did when she had been awake for too long. Her mind, on the other hand, was still whirling. She groaned in annoyance and bit her nail. She noticed that the black nail polish she had taken the time to apply a few hours prior was already chipping and rolled her eyes.

“Friday?”

“The simulation will be complete in a few minutes,” the AI stated.

“Good,” Natasha whispered. She yawned hugely.

 

The sunlight shining through the glass windows of the workshop woke Natasha up the next morning. The young woman rubbed her eyes, only remembering the mascara she had not taken off the night before when it was already too late.

“Good morning,” Friday cheeped, sounding way too cheerful for an AI.

Her back was killing her. Once more, Natasha resolved to stop falling asleep at her desk. Her mouth tasted awful and her once stylized hair must have looked a mess but – look at that – the simulation was complete.

“Perfect,” the woman said as she looked at the design on the screen. “Will it work?” she asked Friday.

“The drones seem to be holding up. I notice a ten percent increase in efficiency compared to the last simulation.”

“Okay, that’s good. Well, it’s not perfect yet, but we’re getting there,” Natasha stated.

The woman was deep in thought, watching intently at the sketch of the bee drone on her computer screen when the door of the workshop slid open.

“Good morning, Miss,” Jarvis said as he entered the room, carrying a tray. “How was the party?” the man asked politely as he handed her a large cup of coffee.

“It was okay,” Natasha said between gulps. “Hammer was there, though.”

“I see how this could have put a damper on your evening,” Jarvis nodded.

Natasha and Justin Hammer’s rivalry was a secret to no one. The man hated Natasha – always had – and not only because her company was more profitable than his own. No! Hammer hated the fact that Natasha was not drooling all over him. Natasha had elected to ignore the man as best as she could in order to never get a repeat of what had happened years ago when she had thrown her drink in his face in the middle of a formal dinner with the cream of the US army. She was willing to admit that had not been her brightest idea, and the media had had a field day with the pictures they had taken. Obadiah had insisted Natasha apologized publicly. She had refused.

Natasha grabbed a toast and pulled up the news feed about the previous evening on the computer screen.

“Look at that,” she said around a mouthful, pointing at the article. “The whole purpose of the evening was to raise funds for the fire department and all they care about is how much that dress cost me!” she exclaimed.

“I believe there were also talks about your designer purse,” Jarvis informed her calmly.

“Unbelievable,” Natasha groaned in annoyance. However, she could not say the article came as a surprise after all those years.

“How is your project going?” Jarvis asked, pointing at the sketches scattered on the desk.

Natasha grabbed another toast. “I think it might be ready on time,” she answered, letting Jarvis change the subject. “I’m going to go to this convention in Madripoor and blow everyone’s mind.”

Jarvis smiled warmly. “I didn’t expect less of you, Miss. Might I remind you of your meeting this afternoon.” Natasha blinked. “With the Manager of your subsidiary in Japan,” Jarvis added after a bit.

“Shit,” Natasha exclaimed around a mouthful of toast. “That’s today?”

Jarvis nodded wordlessly. “You might want to comb your hair,” he advised before turning away.

“I’ll think about it,” Natasha called after him.

Natasha’s head was killing her, she realized as she made her way to her bedroom. She spent more time than what would have been strictly necessary removing all the pins from her curly hair, and tried not to wince as her arms started to ache. She should have felt well rested and not hung-over, as she had been sober for more than a year now.

Natasha finally removed the last pin from her messy hair and stepped in the shower. She sighed at the feeling of the hot water running along her sore muscles.

When Natasha walked into the kitchen, wearing a grey suit, her hair arranged in a stylish bun, she froze at seeing Peter and Kamala sitting at the table and stuffing their face with Jarvis’ delicious cheesecake.

“Aren’t you guys supposed to be at school or something?” she frowned.

Kamala swallowed before answering. “It’s spring break. You look really nice,” she added after a bit.

“Thank you,” Natasha said, pouring herself a glass of water. “I have a meeting at Stark Industries this afternoon,” she explained.

Natasha noticed that Peter and Kamala were trying to eat around the carton boxes piling up on the table and chairs.

“You guys should have moved those,” she told them, pointing at the boxes.

“Where are they supposed to go? We could move all the boxes to the right room later,” Kamala suggested, waving a hand in Peter’s general direction.

“These go to my room, I’ve just finished repainting the walls.”

“Hey, I never agreed to- Aw- Okay, I guess we’re on moving duties,” Peter said, rubbing his shin.

“How’s the remodeling going, anyway?” Kamala asked with interest.

“I’m thinking about having Dum-E and U paint the walls in the other rooms,” Natasha answered.

“As long as you don’t let them paint my room,” Peter said distractingly.

“Your room?” Natasha asked, surprised.

“Not my room obviously– I mean– The guest room I use when I stay over,” he stammered awkwardly.

Natasha stared at him blankly. “Tell you what,” she croaked after a few seconds. “I’ll let you chose the color this time around.”

“If Peter gets a room, then I get a room too,” Kamala piped up.

“Sure thing. Peter gets a room, you get a room, everybody gets a room.”

The two teenagers exchanged a smile.

“When’s your meeting anyway?” Peter asked after a moment of awkward silence.

Natasha looked at the time and jumped in surprise. “Shoot! I need to go. I wanted to talk to Pepper before the meeting. Bye, guys.”

“Later!”

Natasha made it on time to have a quick chat with Pepper before the meeting. For months now, Natasha had been an exemplary CEO. Everybody had been more than surprised when Natasha had started paying attention during meetings of the Board, and taking part in the more administrative and financial aspects of the company rather than focusing all her energy on the R&D Department. Almost losing the company had been the kick in the ass Natasha had needed to get her life back together after leaving the Avengers. Not being Iron Woman anymore, Natasha had focused all her energy on being Natasha Stark, Head of Stark Industries. After years of struggle, Natasha was finally starting to heal. It was a long process, and the fact that she often woke up at the office in the morning with a crick in her neck and sheets of paper stuck to her face was a reminder that she still had a long way to go.

 

She heard people yelling outside the door; a common occurrence that never failed to make her jump in fright. Yingsen had been gone for a long time and Natasha was starting to wonder if she would ever see the man again. She needed him as an assistant, their captors knew that. Yingsen was safe for now. She had made sure of it.

The metal door opened and Natasha tensed immediately. Three men entered the room, talking animatedly in a language Natasha could not understand. As they made their way to her, Natasha took several steps back, until her back hit the rocky wall of the cave. She felt a cold shiver run down her spine. She was trapped.

Then, she heard someone yelling. The men scattered as the leader of the ring rushed into the room.

“I-” she said.

Natasha did not see the slap coming.

“I need you in one piece for this,” the man barked. “Now get back to work.”

Natasha screamed herself awake. Her head was spinning. She raised a shaky hand to her forehead and brushed her damped hair away from her face. She pushed the sheets away and took a deep breath, willing the nausea away. When she finally felt like her legs would not give out, Natasha got out of bed slowly and stumbled to the shower stall.

The hot water was not enough to get rid of the nightmare but it was at least a start. Natasha knew she would not get back to sleep that night. After changing into clean pajamas and putting on a bathrobe, she made her way to the living room.

“Peter? It’s one in the morning, what are you doing up?” she asked the teenager.

Peter turned away from the TV without pausing the game. On screen, his character took a shot to the head.

“I’m not tired,” Peter countered. “Are you okay?” he asked, concerned.

Natasha took in his red eyes and pale face. “Pete, go to bed,” she sighed.

Peter reluctantly stood up. Natasha was obviously not the only one having trouble sleeping around the house.

The woman gently put her hand on Peter’s shoulder. “Try to get some sleep, okay?”

Peter nodded half-heartedly and left the room, dragging his feet on the way out. Natasha flopped down on the couch and wrapped herself in a blanket lying there, grabbed the remote and started flipping through channels.

 

The next morning, Natasha got dressed early, and found herself wandering the empty kitchen in search of breakfast. The woman felt dizzy from lack of sleep and finally went to the living room without having eaten anything. She found Peter on the couch, still in his pajamas.

“Hey Pete, are you okay?” she asked. Peter shook his head weakly. “What’s going on?” Natasha asked gently as she sat down next to him.

“I’m a horrible person,” Peter whispered. Natasha stared at him. “I don’t want to go home today. And I don’t know if I can go to the cemetery by myself.”

Natasha’s breath caught. Today was the anniversary of Peter’s parents’ deaths. How could she have forgotten about it?

“Uncle Ben always went with me and this year’s the first year I–” Peter let out a sob and leaned against her. Natasha wrapped an arm around the boy’s shoulders and pressed a soft kiss on the side of his head. “I didn’t have the guts to ask May to come with me because it would be a reminder that Uncle Ben is gone now and I don’t want to do that to her.”

“Peter,” Natasha sighed. “May is the one who’s supposed to take care of you, not the other way around,” she told him. “And the same goes for me while we’re at it,” she added, shaking her head fondly. Peter looked at her in surprise. “You thought I wouldn’t notice what you and Kamala are doing?” she asked. “I’m the one who’s supposed to protect you guys, not the other way around. Got it?”

Peter smiled weakly. “Got it.”

“Good, now listen to me. You don’t have to go if you’re not feeling up to it, okay? Don’t feel guilty about it, your parents wouldn’t be angry with you for not going. That doesn’t mean you don’t love them anymore, right?” Peter shook his head. “There’s no right way to deal with grief, Peter, believe me. You just have to do what feels right for you.”

“Would you come with me?” Peter asked in a small voice.

“Talk to May?”

Peter shook his head. “To the cemetery,” he told her.

Natasha tried not to let her surprise show. “Sure thing, kiddo. Whatever you want.”

Peter was too young to have lost that many people in his life, Natasha reflected as the boy placed some flowers on his parents’ graves. It hurt seeing Peter so down and Natasha wanted to help him get through his loss more than anything but she had no idea how to go about it. Natasha was no poster child for healthy grieving after all.

Afterwards, Natasha suggested ice cream. She could feel that Peter was not ready to go home just yet, and they spent the rest of the day wandering the busy streets of New York.

 

Despite what Natasha had told Peter, the boy and Kamala did not stop trying to make her feel better by any means available. They took advantage of the holidays to help her remodel the house and, as promised, Natasha let them decorate their rooms. The fact that both kids seemed to genuinely care about her was still baffling.

“Pass me that wrench,” Natasha told Peter.

She brushed a few strands of hair out of her eyes, only for them to fall again as soon as she moved her hand away to grab the tool Peter handed her. She sighed in annoyance and got back to work.

Peter leaned against the car and cleared his throat awkwardly. “Natasha,” he started hesitantly. The woman hummed in answer as she focused on the car. “I kinda need some– huh– relationship advice.”

Natasha frowned and immediately looked away from the car engine to glance at Peter. The boy suddenly seemed very nervous.

“Pete, you know I’m not the most qualified person to talk about these things, right?”

Peter did not even crack a smile. “I realize that,” he said at once. How was she supposed to take that? she wondered, amused. “But there’s no one else I could possibly talk this through with.”

“I’m going to pretend I’m not offended by that,” she joked.

Peter groaned. “Come on, Nat, I’m serious.”

Natasha grabbed a hand towel and took her time cleaning the engine oil off her fingers. “Sorry, kid,” she finally said, looking straight at Peter. “Ask away.”

Peter took a deep breath. “Well, there’s this guy… at school.” Peter stopped and Natasha nodded encouragingly. “And huh – his name is Michael but everybody just calls him MJ and I really like him and I don’t know what to do!” Peter exclaimed.

Natasha put the hand towel away as she gathered her thoughts. “Are you out?” she finally asked. “At school, I mean. Does anybody know?”

Peter slowly nodded. “My friends all do. I’m not exactly hiding it anyway.” Natasha nodded. “I can’t just ask him if he likes guys,” Peter whined, throwing his head back dramatically. “Right?”

Natasha smiled at the boy’s antics. “You should let him know you’re attracted to guys,” she advised. “Don’t make a huge deal out of it. Some offhand comment should do the trick and then see how he reacts.”

Unfortunately, knowing Peter, the boy would probably put his foot in his mouth at some point and end up making a huge deal out of it. Natasha guessed Peter’s awkwardness was part of what made him so endearing in the first place.

“Yeah, okay, I can do that,” Peter said. “I can definitely do that.”

“Good.”

Both of them startled when Natasha’s phone suddenly went off. Her smile disappeared as soon as she saw the caller ID.

“Director Hill,” Natasha greeted with forced cheerfulness.

Peter looked up, surprised.

“Cut the crap, Stark,” Hill countered in a gruff voice. “This isn’t a courtesy call.”

“Right. What can I do for you, Director?”

“We noticed an energy signal on our screens,” Director Hill started without preamble. “But we can’t pinpoint the source with our equipment, it’ll take us weeks to find the exact location,” she explained.

“I might have something for you,” Natasha admitted reluctantly.

“Good. Don’t make me wait.”

Director Hill disconnected the call abruptly and Natasha sighed in annoyance.

“Here goes my plans for tonight,” she mumbled.

“Hey, can I come with you?” Peter asked enthusiastically.

“Hell no!” Natasha countered at once.

Peter’s face fell. “Why not? I promise I won’t embarrass you.”

“Peter, listen to me carefully,” Natasha started, gently resting both hands on Peter’s shoulders. She waited for him to look at her before adding, “I don’t want them near you. I don’t trust them, especially Maria Hill. You know what they tried to do with my suits.”

“But you agreed to help them just now,” Peter pointed out in a small voice.

“That’s not the same,” Natasha explained. “They need my expertise as Doctor Stark. They’d probably manage on their own anyway but I’m actually curious to see what kind of mess they got themselves into.” Natasha gently placed her hand on Peter’s cheek. “I don’t want them anywhere near you.”

“Okay,” Peter said quietly.

“You should head home now. It’s nearly time for dinner; May’s going to worry.”

“Actually, I– I told her I’d stay here tonight. She’s out with a couple friends and she tends to worry when I’m alone at home. I didn’t want her to worry over me. She knows I’m safe here,” Peter said.

Natasha froze. It had been a while since anyone had told her they felt safe with her.

“Okay,” she nodded. “Go see Jarvis, he’ll fix you some dinner.”

“Thanks, Tasha. Good luck.”

 

 

_One year earlier_

The audience laughed and that made Natasha smile. She waved and got off the stage as the next guest took her place.

“You made some really good points out there,” a brown-haired woman told Natasha as she walked up to her. “I’m Jane, by the way,” she said, extending her hand to Natasha. “Doctor Jane Foster,” she added.

“Right, I saw your presentation this morning, it was… interesting.”

Jane laughed. “Which is your polite way of saying you didn’t understand a word I said.”

“Well, I understood a few words,” Natasha joked.

“I wanted to thank you for the donations to Metro-General Hospital and your recent interest in the medical field,” Jane told her with a kind smile. “We have a few of your surgical robots at the hospital and it’s really making a different, so thank you.”

“I-”

Natasha would have normally discarded the compliment with an offhand comment but something about Jane thanking her and actually meaning it stopped her.

“Thanks, it means a lot,” she finally said. “You know I never thought about this but you guys must see some crazy shit going down at the hospital.”

“You have no idea! Just last week we…” she stopped as she caught sight of a man walking past them.

“Who’s that?” Natasha asked, following Jane’s gaze.

Jane sighed in annoyance. “That’s my ex, Donald,” Jane explained.

“Bad break up?”

“The usual, I’d say,” Jane answered. “He left for another job. And another woman.”

“Ouch, sorry to hear that.”

“Yeah, I guess some people just aren’t meant to be,” Jane stated flatly.

 

Natasha should have known that the crazy would follow her wherever she went. However, a suicide at a medical conference was not something she was prepared for. When they had found one of Jane’s colleague in her room the next morning, nobody thought about looking beyond the most obvious reasons.

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Natasha told Jane later that same day. Jane nodded weakly. “How are you holding up?”

“There’s something wrong,” Jane declared. “She’d never-”

Natasha pressed Jane’s arm gently. “It’s hard to tell sometimes. We can’t really know what’s truly going on in someone’s head.”

She knew that from first-hand experience, she thought bitterly, remembering the lack of interest her so called friends and teammates had taken into her welfare.

“I know that, I’m a doctor,” Jane countered. “I’m telling you, there’s something fishy going on here. Are you going to help me or not?”

“I’m sorry, I wish I could help.”

Jane frowned. “Right.”

 

That was one of those times, Natasha reflected later, when she wished she could trust people more easily. Jane had been right all along, of course, and Natasha was about to pay the price for her mistrust. Something fishy had been going on after all.

Natasha looked around warily. She took in the green grass, the tall trees casting their shadows on the gravestones... She knew that place. She had been there once before, the day her parents had been buried.

Natasha’s eyes fell on the gravestones in front of her and a few tears rolled down her cheeks at seeing her parent’s names. _Beloved husband and father_. _Beloved wife and mother_. Natasha’s grief was choking her. Years and years of pent-up emotions finally broke to the surface.

Natasha had never mourned her parents. Either consciously or subconsciously, she had never accepted their deaths, or come to term with the way they had been snatched away from her so suddenly. A car accident had seemed so sudden, so tragic and devoid of meaning that Natasha had not been able to process her parents’ deaths for days after the event. Obadiah had taken care of the funerals for her, had driven the paparazzi away as they lurked at the back of the cemetery to take a shot of her crying. He had taken charge of the company’s legal issues regarding succession. She had been so grateful for that man. She remembered Jarvis trying to get through to her while mourning the loss of one of his closest friend himself. Natasha, still a teenager at the time, had been too angry to fully realize how lucky she was to have Jarvis in her life.

Natasha never had had a good relationship with her parents. Howard had always wanted a son and resented Natasha for the mere fact that she was a woman. No matter how hard Natasha worked, it was never good enough for Howard. Natasha had resented her mother for not being more affectionate towards her and never standing up to Howard when he was being too hard on his daughter. The girl had suffered from their absence just as much as she had suffered from their presence in her life.

The woman dried her tears angrily and looked away from her parents’ graves. She glanced to the right, and what she saw froze her to the bone.

NATASHA STARK

1983 - 2018

No inscriptions. No flowers. She was truly alone in the world.

“Nobody to mourn you,” the voice in her head said as she wept silently.

Natasha fell on her knees against her own gravestone as she shook with sobs, unable to breathe.

“Ah, Natasha,” a voice said behind her. Natasha turned her head around sharply and looked up to see Obadiah Stane standing in front of her. Alive. “Natasha. The genius. The visionary,” Obadiah went on. “Have you ever wondered what will be left of you when you leave this Earth?” he asked with a smile. The man took a step towards her and kneeled down to touch Natasha’s shoulder tenderly. Natasha knew that his concern for her had never been more than a façade. “Your company? Your name? What is your legacy, Natasha?” he asked, putting his hand on her cheek. “I’m so grateful for the years you spent building weapons. You made me a rich man. Your father would have been so proud of you, following in his footsteps. How do you sleep at night, Natasha? Knowing people have died because of something you built? How does it feel to have that many deaths on your conscience?”

“God- Shut up,” Natasha sobbed.

“You’re a plague to this world, Natasha. If I believed in God, I’d say you’re his greatest weapon. From time to time, the world needs a Flood to move forwards. That’s where you come in,” Obadiah told her, patting a finger against Natasha’s chest. “You bring a storm of fire and death in your path. You are the Flood, Natasha. That’s what you always have been and what you will always be remembered for.”

“Shut up!” Natasha yelled, pushing the man away.

“The world would have been better off if you had died with your parents that night,” Obadiah told her ruthlessly. “Don’t deny it, you’ve been thinking it for years. Do you remember that feeling?” he said softly. “Alone at night with an empty bottle in your hands, thinking that maybe you could end it all. End the suffering. Forever.”

Natasha buried her face in her hands and shook her head. “You’re not real,” she told him weakly. “You’re not real.”

“I’m as real as can be,” Obadiah told her matter-of-factly. “I might be a figment of your imagination but those things you’re feeling right now? They’re very much real. You can’t fight them. Deep down you know you don’t even want to.”

“I’m stronger than this,” Natasha countered.

Obadiah chuckled. “Who are you trying to convince, Natasha? You’re alone here. You’re alone out there. That’s not going to change.”

“ _Natasha!_ ”

“ _Natasha! Damn it!_ ”

“ _Snap out of it! Come on Stark, there’re people here who need you!_ ”

Natasha opened her eyes with difficulty and found herself face to face with Jane Foster.

“Good, you’re back,” Jane sighed in relief. “I thought I’d lost you for a moment.”

“What happened?” Natasha asked in a hoarse voice.

“He got to you,” Jane explained.

“Who?”

“Me,” a man said, entering the room.

Natasha looked at the newcomer, a middle-aged man with brown hair, a bushy beard and, Natasha noticed, surprised, a monocle.

“Who the hell are you?” Natasha asked angrily as she stood up slowly. Seeing her struggling, Jane grabbed her arm and helped her up.

“My identity doesn’t matter,” the man countered. “Only my work does. And you are standing in my way.”

“Too bad,” Natasha told him flippantly.

The man laughed. “You know, when I decided to do this little experiment, I had not accounted for your presence. But I’m glad you’re here, Natasha. I get to be the one to kill Iron Woman.”

“Iron Woman is gone,” Natasha replied.

“Not yet,” the man said. “But you will be soon enough.”

“Why are you doing this?” Jane exclaimed.

Natasha glanced at the other woman and was surprised to notice just how calm she looked. Then again, Jane was an emergency doctor in New York and had dealt with her fair share of supervillain-induced accidents, alien invasions, as well as the general power outage suffered by the city a couple years ago – courtesy of MODOK. The woman was used to their special brand of crazy.

“Science,” the man answered calmly. “And power. I realized that fear was a powerful motivator for most people. Control people’s fears and you control their actions. You, Natasha, are the perfect example of that. Can you imagine the power in the hands of the man who controls Iron Woman?”

Natasha felt a cold shiver run down her spine. No. God, no. Everything but that.

“I’ve seen inside your head. I know exactly what you’re thinking right now. I’ve seen the self-hatred and doubt in your mind, I can help you with that, you know,” he said softly. “Make it all go away. Wouldn’t you like that?”

“Don’t listen to him,” Jane whispered, squeezing Natasha’s arm.

“What about you, Doctor Foster?” the man asked, turning his attention to Jane. “I’m dying to see what’s hiding inside that pretty head of yours.”

It was like being back in the cave all over again, except this time Natasha was not as helpless as she once had been. She closed her eyes for a second and tried to focus on that feeling. She tried to ignore her self-doubt and all the negative feelings she had associated with Iron Woman and only focused on the defensive part of her former Avengers life. She still remembered some self-defense moves, even if she had not used them in a while. Making the most of the man’s distraction, Natasha raised her arms in a defensive position, flexed one leg and kicked the man as hard as she could with the other. The man toppled over in pain, surprised at the sudden attack. Natasha did not give him enough time to recover. Her knee connected with the man’s face and she heard the distinctive crack of his nose breaking.

Natasha had lost no time in contacting SHIELD that day and had almost felt relieved at the sight of their usual black vehicles pulling over to retrieve the man identified as Doctor Faustus.

Even a year later, Natasha had not forgotten that name. Daisy had broken SHIELD’s rules by informing Natasha that Faustus had managed to escape their custody a few weeks after being arrested. No one had heard about him since.


	2. Out of time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here comes our monthly update

After opening her eyes, Sarah had to blink a few times to get used to the brightness of the room.

White walls. Clean air. Uncomfortable bed. She obviously was in a medical facility of some sort.

The woman tried to sit up on the bed, ignoring the uncomfortable tension in her arms and legs, and groaned.

“Captain Rogers,” a young woman with a British accent said as soon as she heard Sarah. “You shouldn’t move yet,” the woman added.

The woman smiled reassuringly at Sarah but her whole demeanor seemed off and had the exact opposite effect on Sarah.

The soldier tensed up. “Where am I?” she asked menacingly.

Sarah’s mind was screaming at her: Hydra. Danger. Run!

The woman kept on smiling, although her eyes betrayed some concern. Sarah noted her white coat. A nurse, then, she deduced. Or some sort of scientist. Sarah quickly looked at her own hands and noticed with relief that there was no sign suggesting that anybody had been experimenting on her recently. Still, something was not adding up and the woman had to find out what.

“I’m Doctor Simmons,” the woman said. “But you can call me Jemma.”

“What’s going on?” Sarah asked.

Doctor Simmons looked away for a second before saying, “We’ve found your plane trapped in ice, in Greenland. You crashed,” she informed Sarah in a gentle voice.

“Yes,” Sarah whispered. “I– I remember.”

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

“I’m not telling you jack shit until you tell me exactly where I am. Are you Hydra?” she accused. “How did you find me?”

Doctor Simmons lifted both hands reassuringly. “You’re in New York,” she answered at last. “We’ve found your plane a couple days ago. I’m not a Hydra agent, although I guess that’s exactly what a Hydra agent would say,” she added as an afterthought. “I’m with S.H.I.E.L.D.”

“Never heard of it.”

“Actually,” Doctor Simmons smiled. “S.H.I.E.L.D. used to be called the SSR. The Strategic Scientific Reserve.”

“What do you mean ‘used to’?” Sarah frowned.

The woman in front of her froze suddenly. “You were asleep,” she finally said. “We found you in the ice. Captain Rogers– Sarah– You’ve been asleep for more than seventy years.”

Sarah’s head was spinning. She gripped the side of the bed.

“No, you’re lying. That’s– that’s not possible!” she exclaimed.

Doctor Simmons took a few steps back. The door suddenly opened and two guards stepped inside the room.

“Don’t,” Doctor Simmons told them urgently. “Everything’s fine. You’re only going to make things worse!”

Sarah’s ears were ringing. She jumped on her feet and rushed to the other door she had noticed after waking up. She ran until she finally found a door opening on the outside and froze. Nothing could have prepared her for what she saw below. She slowly walked to the edge and glanced down. She was in the air, standing on some sort of gigantic plane, hovering above the skyline of New York City. She had made it back home, she realized. The sound of the engines made it impossible to hear anything that was happening in the streets below but Sarah could imagine the city bursting with life below her feet.

Doctor Simmons came to a stop next to her, breathing heavily as she tried to catch her breath. Sarah did not look away from the city but even then, she knew that the two guards had not followed them outside.

“What year is it?” Sarah asked quietly.

“2018.” Sarah nodded wordlessly. “Are you alright?” Doctor Simmons asked.

“That’s a lot to take in,” Sarah answered truthfully.

“I know. Let me know when you’re ready to go back inside, alright?”

 

Sarah followed Doctor Simmons – Jemma, the woman insisted – back inside the infirmary a few minutes later. The doctor informed her that they were currently in a S.H.I.E.L.D. facility – a helicarrier, as she called it – hovering above the city of New York. The helicarrier was hidden from view by means of an advanced cloaking device.

As she answered Sarah’s numerous questions, Doctor Simmons kept watching her warily, as though fearing that an excess of information would make her snap. Sarah did not have the heart to tell the woman that Captain America had actually seen far weirder than any of this.

By the time they made it back to the infirmary, Sarah was feeling much more in control. Her mind was less fogy. She knew she would need to keep a clear head in the following days.

Sarah sat on the edge of the infirmary bed.

“We’re still not sure how you survived in the ice for so long,” Doctor Simmons informed her as she glanced at the file in her hands. “I’m going to need a blood sample to–”

“No,” Sarah replied at once.

Doctor Simmons frowned. “I just need to make a few simple analyses–”

“I’m sorry but no,” Sarah said again, trying to remain calm. “I’m going to need more than a few minutes to trust that agency you claim to work for. S.H.I.E.L.D., was it?”

Doctor Simmons nodded slowly, apparently finding herself at a loss for words. She had finally stopped smiling.

“Captain Rogers. I simply want to make sure you are healthy. That’s all,” Doctor Simmons explained in a soothing voice.

“And I’m telling you that you’ll do nothing of the sort until I know for sure I can trust you.”

The door opened suddenly and Sarah turned around sharply. A woman with short brown hair made her way inside the room. The newcomer smiled brightly at Doctor Simmons.

“Everything’s alright in here?” she asked, turning her smile to Sarah.

Her eyes were telling a different story, though. Sarah knew a field agent when she saw one and that young woman – despite her easygoing manners – had the potential to be deadly.

“Everything’s fine,” Doctor Simmons answered.

“Hi, I’m Daisy,” the woman told Sarah, extending her hand. Sarah shook it, surprised. “My dad’s a huge fan of yours. He works here, so you’ll probably see him at some point.”

“Daisy,” Doctor Simmons called pointedly.

“Director Hill is this close to having an aneurism,” Daisy said conversationally. “I decided to go in before she sends one of those goons standing outside. Yeah, I’m talking about you, Hunter!” she yelled at the closed door.

Sarah almost smiled. The woman’s apparent goofiness might not be an act after all. Doctor Simmons seemed used to the woman’s strange behavior at least. She simply rolled her eyes.

“Could you try to be professional?” she scolded, barely containing a smile.

“Come on, we both know that professional went out the window when we got married. Or was it when Coulson adopted me?” she added as an afterthought.

Sarah glanced at them both. “I’m sorry,” she cut in, feeling oddly giddy. “Are you two–” She stopped mid-sentence, not knowing what to ask exactly.

Doctor Simmons frowned in confusion. Daisy, on the other hand, seemed to catch her meaning at once and smiled brightly.

“This amazing doctor is my wife,” Daisy confirmed. “I’m pretty lucky, right?”

Doctor Simmons blushed slightly and pointedly glanced at the file in her hands. Sarah could not help looking around. The glass in front of them was most probably a one-way mirror and anybody could have been listening. How come Daisy was acting so flippant about this?

“And both of you–” Sarah tried. The words died in her throat. God, there was no way of asking this politely, was it? “They let you work here?” she finally asked.

“I’m not a field agent,” Doctor Simmons informed her. “As long as we’re not on the same team, they can’t say anything. Even then, let’s just say fraternization rules are not strictly obeyed around here.”

Sarah gaped. That was not the answer she had been looking for.

Daisy stared at her for a moment. “Oh,” she gasped. “I’m guessing that’s not what she was asking, Jem,” Daisy said quietly.

“What would– Oh.”

The two agents glanced at each other.

“Captain Rogers,” Doctor Simmons started. “There’ve been a lot of change since your… disappearance,” she finished tactfully.

“Gay people can get married now,” Daisy blurted out.

Sarah’s eyes went wide. “Really?” she exclaimed, smiling for the first time in God knows how long.

Daisy nodded vigorously. “It’s pretty recent, though and not everybody agrees with it, of course. And up until a few years ago, there were still things like DADT to worry about– And some states had already legalized gay marriage while others hadn’t.”

“Daisy, you’re overwhelming her,” Doctor Simmons cut in.

“Come on, does she look overwhelmed to you?” Daisy asked, pointing at Sarah’s smile.

“I’m fine,” Sarah told them.

“See! She’s fine.”

“Please, go on,” Sarah added.

Daisy let out a laugh. “Maybe another time, Captain. I need to go back to my station. So, we’re good here?”

Doctor Simmons and Sarah nodded.

“Good. See you later.”

“Thank you,” Sarah called after her when Daisy stepped out of the room. The woman waved without turning around.

Doctor Simmons and Sarah glanced at each other awkwardly.

 

After spending several days scooped up in the infirmary, Sarah was getting the feeling that S.H.I.E.L.D. had actually no idea what to make of Captain America’s sudden reappearance. In fact, they had absolutely no idea what to do with Sarah.

Doctor Simmons had stopped asking her for blood samples, at least.

Daisy had been kind enough to provide Sarah with history books that had turned out to be essential for Sarah as she tried to get reacquainted with the world. The young woman was starting to realize just how much she had missed during the seventy years she had been asleep. As she read, each sentence made Sarah feel more and more like a stranger. A lot had happened. Most of the time, she did not know what to think about what she was reading.

Daisy had also managed to sneak in some classified files from S.H.I.E.L.D.’s archives. Sarah had not been expecting anyone she knew to be still alive after so many years, of course. Still, reading about Howard’s accident and Peggy’s death had been a shock.

Peggy, Sarah had been happy to learn, had had a good life after the war. Sarah was not surprised in the least to read that Peggy had in fact cofounded S.H.I.E.L.D. and that, more than anything she had seen in the past few days, made her want to trust the agency.

Howard, on the other hand, had died in a car crash along with his wife and had left a teenage girl alone in the world. Howard’s daughter had her own personal file as well, Sarah noticed. Doctor Natasha Stark. Iron Woman. Sarah was horrified to read about what had happened to the woman. That kind of experience would have killed anyone else, but the woman seemed to have come the other end even stronger. That woman seemed to be something special, and Sarah was curious to meet her one day. However, judging by the content of the file, S.H.I.E.L.D. did not appear very fond of Doctor Stark.

Director Hill had taken the time to visit Sarah in the infirmary. Interrogate her, Sarah thought bitterly. Director Hill seemed like the kind of person that knew exactly what she wanted and was ready to do anything to get it. The woman’s eyes were cold and calculating, and her rigid stance was exactly what one would have expected of the director of an agency of that scale. She radiated authority but Sarah could not trust the woman just yet. Director Hill did not appear to be overly fond of people with abilities – or “enhanced” as she called them – and Sarah’s return seemed to annoy the woman most of all.

Despite her obvious dislike of the situation, Director Hill had offered Sarah a job as a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent that Sarah had yet to accept.

The truth was… Now that she was back, Sarah had no idea what to do with herself. In this strange new world, Sarah felt more alone than ever before.

If Sarah took too long to make up her mind, she feared S.H.I.E.L.D. would finally decide that her return was an inconvenience for them and make her disappear for good this time.

Sarah was contemplating the idea of making a run for it, even if that meant jumping out of the helicarrier without a parachute.

Then, she met Doctor Natasha Stark.

Doctor Stark’s arrival was announced by a deeply annoyed agent. “Stark’s coming this way,” the agent pointed out, rolling his eyes.

Doctor Stark crossed the threshold a few seconds later, walking purposefully, as if she owned the place. The woman was obviously Howard’s daughter and Sarah could have guessed it just by looking at her. The deep brown eyes and dark hair were a dead giveaway, of course, but beyond mere physical resemblance, Sarah recognized the smirk and self-confidence well enough.

Howard’s daughter was older than her, Sarah suddenly realized. The thought made her head spin.

“Doctor Stark!” Doctor Simmons greeted, unable to hide her surprise. “I thought you’d have left by now.”

Doctor Stark stared at Simmons, raising one eyebrow. “You know I hate to stick around more than strictly necessary,” Doctor Stark said matter-of-factly. “But Director Hill has apparently been too busy to receive me, so I’ve decided to take matters into my own hands.”

The woman had yet to acknowledge Sarah’s presence.

“I don’t understand–” Doctor Simmons mumbled.

Doctor Stark made her way to Sarah and grabbed the duffle bag lying next to the bed.

“I see Daisy has made good on her promise,” Doctor Stark stated, finally glancing at Sarah. “I’m Natasha by the way,” she said as she thrust the bag into Sarah’s arms.

Daisy had been kind enough to bring Sarah some change of clothes in addition to the books and files. That duffle bag contained all of Sarah’s possessions at the moment.

“Come on,” Doctor Stark told her. “Let’s blow this popsicle stand.”

Sarah had no idea what the words coming out of Doctor Stark’s mouth could possibly mean and – judging by Doctor Simmons’ wide eyes – this actually was a common occurrence around here.

“Doctor Stark, Director Hill has given us strict orders,” Simmons countered.

“Hill has no idea what to do with her,” Doctor Stark replied, pointing a finger in Sarah’s direction. “How long has she been scooped up in here, huh? Two– three days? At this rate, the poor girl will go bonkers before Hill makes her decision. I’m making you all a huge favor, here.” Doctor Simmons was about to reply when the other woman added, “I already cleared it with Coulson. He’s waiting outside with Daisy.”

Doctor Simmons sighed in defeat. “Alright,” she finally said.

Doctor Stark nodded and turned to Sarah. “Ready to go?” she asked.

Sarah did not hesitate for one second. She jumped on her feet. “Yes,” she said firmly.

As she followed Doctor Stark through the long corridors, Sarah realized just how big the helicarrier actually was.

The other woman seemed to be avoiding S.H.I.E.L.D. agents as much as possible and Sarah wondered how much trouble they would find themselves in if they were to get caught.

They met with Daisy and Agent Coulson – whom Sarah had briefly met during her prolonged stay in the infirmary – on the flight deck.

“Busting her out, then?” Coulson asked, clearly amused.

“So to speak,” Doctor Stark answered distractingly.

“You could have asked Hill, you know.”

“Now, where’s the fun in that?”

Coulson rolled his eyes and stepped aside. Sarah followed Doctor Stark and Daisy inside one of the aircraft, and sat down on the bench while Daisy sat on the pilot seat.

“Alright, buckle up everyone,” the young agent exclaimed cheerfully.

 

“Doctor Stark,” Sarah said, stopping in front of the woman’s car, a beautiful metal grey convertible.

The other woman rolled her eyes. “Call me Natasha,” she said as she opened the door and sat behind the wheel.

She stared at Sarah and the blonde suddenly found herself at a loss for words.

“Thanks for busting me out,” she finally said before getting inside the car.

Natasha smirked as she started the engine.

As they drove, Sarah looked around her, trying to get reacquainted with the city where she once grew up. When they finally came to a stop in front of a mansion, Sarah’s eyes widened in surprise. She knew the Stark family was rich of course, but she had never thought about it much. The gates opened and Natasha drove the car up the alley. Sarah followed the woman to the front door which opened, revealing a middle-aged man.

“Miss Natasha,” the man said in a British accent.

“Hey, J.,” the woman greeted with a genuine smile. “This is Captain Rogers,” Natasha added, pointing a finger in Sarah’s direction. “She’s going to stay with us for a while. Cap, this is Edwin Jarvis. You need anything, just ask him, okay?”

Sarah nodded wordlessly.

“If I may,” Mr. Jarvis said, “It is a pleasure having you here, Captain Rogers.”

“Thank you,” Sarah smiled. “And please, call me Sarah.”

The man smiled politely at her and Sarah got the feeling this would not be the last time she would have to tell him to call her by her first name.

“Could you take Captain Rogers’ bag to one of the upstairs room, J.? The one next to Peter’s should do.”

Mr. Jarvis nodded. He took Sarah’s bag and disappeared upstairs.

“You have a butler?” Sarah blurted out.

“Jarvis has been working for my family for decades, he practically raised me,” Natasha casually said. “Come on, I’ll give you a tour.”

The woman hanged her leather jacket on the coat hanger near the door. Sarah did a double take; she had no idea what that AC/DC printed on Natasha’s grey shirt actually meant.

Sarah looked around the lobby and was surprised to notice how modern the inside of the mansion looked compared to the outside.

“Excuse the mess,” Natasha said as Sarah peeked at the first room to the left, a half-furnished and very large living room. “I’m remodeling.”

Sarah followed Natasha to the kitchen, which was situated on the other side of the lobby, and was surprised to find two teenagers sitting at the table, eating and talking animatedly.

“And this is Peter and Kamala,” Natasha introduced. “They’re basically here for the food.”

Peter choked on a piece of meatloaf and Kamala rolled her eyes. “Yeah, this has nothing to do with the fact that the mansion is one of the rare places we are completely safe or that you help us with our homework. We’re just here for Jarvis’ meatloaf,” the girl deadpanned.

Natasha shook her head fondly. “Guys, this is Sarah Rogers,” she introduced casually. “She's going to stay with us for a while.”

“I don't want to intrude,” Sarah countered at once.

“Nonsense! This mansion is highly secured, you know, if you were an intruder, believe me, you’d know it by now,” she joked.

Peter and Kamala gaped. “Sarah Rogers?” the boy asked. “As in-”

“Captain America?” Kamala shrieked.

Natasha pinched the bridge of her nose as Sarah’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Like _the_ Captain America?” Peter added.

“It is such an honor!” Kamala exclaimed.

“But wait,” Peter frowned, turning to Natasha. “Where did you find her? Wasn’t she, you know, dead?” he added, lowering his voice.

Natasha glared at the boy. “Don’t you guys have homework to finish?” she asked pointedly.

Kamala and Peter jumped on their feet.

“Does this mean I have to throw all my Captain America merch away?” Kamala whispered as the two teens left the room.

“What? Why?” Peter asked.

“Think about it, Peter, I can't really go around wearing Captain America T-shirts if she's going to live here,” the girl explained. “Do you wear your Iron Woman T-shirts around Natasha?”

“Well, no.”

“See.”

“Only because it makes her look really sad when I do,” Peter pointed out.

“Oh.”

Sarah turned her attention back to Natasha. “What was that all about?” she asked without heat.

“Yeah, sorry about that, they can get a bit much sometimes. But they’re nice kids.”

“Nobody knew who I was,” Sarah explained. “Nobody knew Captain America was Sarah Rogers.”

Natasha made a face. “I guess nobody at S.H.I.E.L.D. told you about that, go figure. Look, Sarah, a few years ago S.H.I.E.L.D. got hacked by MODOK… And I guess you have no idea who I am talking about. He’s one of the bad guys,” Natasha explained. “And he dumped all of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s dirty little secrets online. Every last one of them. It could have destroyed the agency but Maria Hill took charge and managed to restore their image. She’s the one who said they needed to come clean about Project Rebirth and their involvement in sending Captain America to the front line. They didn’t go halfway about it either. There was a huge backlash at first, since you know, everybody thought you were a guy and everything, but hey, now you have your very own exhibit at the Smithsonian,” Natasha added with a smile.

Sarah gaped at the woman. “What?” she croaked.

“Congratulations, you’re famous,” Natasha exclaimed. “You even have your own action figure and everything.”

Sarah sat down on a stool, at a loss for words.

“Look, I know this is a lot to take in,” Natasha said quietly. “But people are all about transparency these days, which means that people like you don’t get much of a private life.” Sarah nodded slowly. “Are you going to be okay?” Natasha asked, concerned.

Sarah cleared her throat. “Yeah, I’m okay,” she said.

 

The next morning, Sarah ran into Natasha. Sarah noticed that the woman was wearing the same clothes as the day before and had bags under her eyes. She was clutching a cup of coffee as though her life depended on it.

“You’re up early,” Natasha pointed out. She covered her mouth with her hand to hide a yawn.

“I’m going for a run,” Sarah told her.

“Going for a run?”

“Yeah, you know, exercising.”

Natasha rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I know what that means, thank you very much,” she said, deadpan. “I’m just surprised. I thought you’d be-”

“What?” Sarah asked, crossing her arms defensively.

“No, nothing,” she said. “Director Hill thought all those changes would fry your brain,” she admitted. “I’m glad to see she was wrong.”

Sarah nodded slowly. “You should come with me,” she suggested suddenly.

Natasha’s eyes widened in surprise – or horror, Sarah could not tell.

“Running?” Natasha squeaked. Sarah nodded. “No, thank you. I’m going to catch some z’s before my Board Meeting this afternoon.”

“Oh, okay. Well, see you later then.”

Natasha nodded wordlessly as she yawned again and walked away.

Sarah did not know what she had been expecting going out on her own so soon after waking up in the future. Not the future, she chastised herself. She had to start thinking about it as the present. Exercising had seemed like the safest option, and the only one at her disposal as S.H.I.E.L.D. had provided her mostly with gym clothes and no money at all while they took care of the formalities regarding her unexpected return to the world of the living. Sarah was grateful for that at least; she was not sure she could have managed the intricacies of modern administration on her own.

During the war, Sarah had been longing for her home city and now that she was back, everything seemed out of place. Looking around as she ran, she paid attention to people’s clothes as they rushed down the streets, talking animatedly, hailing taxis or walking their dogs. Some of them had carton cups of coffee in their hands and briefcases as they rushed towards the metro station.

It felt like coming home after a long absence and Sarah had no idea if her uneasiness had to do with coming back from the war or waking up after nearly seventy years. It probably was a mix of both, if she was being honest.

Sarah ran all the way to the East River and the park she remembered before she shipped out to the front. She used to sit down and draw for hours. In fact, that had been one of her favorite pastimes.

Sarah came to a stop and learnt her elbows on the railing facing the river. She was back home, yet she had never felt so out of place and so alone. Her parents had died long before the war, Bucky had never made it back from Europe, Peggy and Howard had died when Sarah had been asleep. Everyone she knew from her previous life was dead. And here she was.

“Are you okay, Miss?” someone asked in a small voice.

Sarah barely registered someone tugging on her shirt. She glanced down and found herself face to face with a little girl. Sarah had not realized she had been crying.

“Yes, I’m fine,” she said gently, drying her tears. “Thank you.”

Sarah decided to head back to the mansion after that. She took a long shower before heading to the living room. Truth was, she had no idea what to do.

Sarah was surprised to see the same teenage boy she had met the day before – Peter, if she remembered correctly – sitting cross-legged on the couch, biting on a pen. He turned around sharply as Sarah entered the room.

“Hi,” she ventured. “Peter, right?”

The boy nodded vigorously. “Hi, Captain,” he croaked.

“Call me Sarah,” she told him as she took a couple steps towards the boy. “What are you working on?” she asked curiously.

Peter stared at her blankly. “Oh,” he said at last, shaking his head. “Homework. History.”

Sarah winced internally. “Well, that’s not really my cup of tea these days,” she said, half-jokingly.

“Actually-” Peter said. “Hey, you were around for the Great Depression, right?” he suddenly asked.

Sarah laughed, surprised. “Yeah, you could say that.”

She sat down next to the boy.

“That’s great!” he said, practically shoving his schoolbook under her nose. “I mean- it’s awful- must have been awful growing up during that time- I’m completely rubbish at history. Please, help?” he asked, glancing at her with a shy smile.

Sarah shook her head fondly. “Sure.”

They had been talking for almost an hour when Natasha wandered in the room, pale faced.

“Hi, Nat,” Peter exclaimed, immediately discarding his books.

“Hi, kid,” the woman greeted in a slurred voice as she walked up to them. She took a sip of coffee. “I see you’re already preying on the elderly,” she pointed out with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s no bother,” Sarah told her at once.

Peter rolled his eyes and started gathering his things. “I need to go anyway. I’m having lunch with May, I don’t want to be late.”

“Tell her I say hi,” Natasha said, rubbing her eyes distractingly.

“Sure thing,” Peter exclaimed. “See you later. Bye, Captain, thanks for the help,” he waved.

“Sarah,” she corrected.

“Send me a text when you get home,” Natasha told him hurriedly.

Peter nodded and walked away.

“What’s a text?” Sarah asked, looking at Natasha.

The woman glanced at her from above her mug of coffee. “Right, I guess you haven’t seen a cellphone yet,” she pointed out, grabbing something from the back pocket of her jeans.

Natasha handed Sarah what looked like a thin sheet of plastic and metal. Sarah carefully took it in her hands and stared at the small device. “That’s a phone?” she asked in wonder. She pressed a button and the screen suddenly lighted up with the Stark Industry logo.

“Yeup,” Natasha answered with a grin. “It’s one of my new prototypes,” she explained. She leaned over to touch the screen and show Sarah the basic features of the device. “You know what, why don’t you keep this one?” the brunette suggested. “I’ve been testing it for bugs and it seems to work.”

“Are you sure?” Sarah asked, eyes widening in surprise.

Natasha shrugged. “Of course,” she told her nonchalantly.

“Thank you!”

“Don’t mention it,” Natasha said, taking another gulp.

“Who’s May?” Sarah asked after a moment of silence.

Natasha stared at her unblinkingly. “May? Oh- May is Peter’s aunt. He’s been living with her since he was a kid.”

Sarah nodded. “So he doesn’t live here then?” she asked.

“Good god, no,” Natasha exclaimed, surprised. “Poor kid. Why would you think that?”

“I noticed he spent the night. I was curious, I guess.”

“Oh,” Natasha whispered. “He stays over during the weekend, and the holidays. Sometime on school nights too, I guess. Why wouldn’t he, though? Have you seen this place? The workshop alone!” Natasha exclaimed. “I didn’t show you the workshop, right? I need to show you the workshop,” she added without letting Sarah time to answer. “But it’ll have to be later though,” she said, checking the time. “I’m going to be-” A sharp sound coming from her jacket pocket interrupted her. “Late,” she sighed.

Natasha set her half-finished cup of coffee on the table and pulled out a phone from her pocket. How many of those did the woman carry? She gave Sarah an apologetic smile before answering.

“Peps! I know, I know. I’m on my way. I’m in my car actually. I can’t talk to you right now- okay bye.” She hung up. “I really need to go,” she told Sarah. “Make yourself at home, okay. I mean that. We’ve got a gym, a pool, a library nobody uses and a huge TV of course. Tell Jarvis I’ll be back for dinner, okay?”

Sarah nodded wordlessly as the brunette left the room in a hurry.

The future just kept getting more and more interesting.


	3. Time present and time past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title is a quote by T.S. Eliot

Sarah quickly slipped into the habit of jogging in the morning. Exercising was a way of taking a step back and allow her to process the changes she had been through since getting out of the ice. If Sarah was being honest, she also needed to process everything that had happened to her after becoming Captain America.

When Sarah had disappeared, the war was yet to be won and now, seventy years later, the war was over, but Sarah felt like the battlefield had followed her to New York. More than once, Sarah found herself jumping in surprise at hearing a loud noise or waking up screaming in the middle of the night, feeling like she was falling in the water over and over again.

When she heard the music coming from the living room as she walked down the corridor, Sarah thought that Jarvis might already be up. She entered the room hesitantly and froze on the spot when she saw Peter and Kamala, both wearing Avengers pajamas and socks, sliding backwards smoothly towards each other. The two teenagers faced each other, both of them holding a remote control, and started mouthing the lyrics, scrunching up their faces as much as they could. Sarah blinked. She should add dancing to the list of things that had changed since the forties, she realized, dumbfounded.

Kamala started jumping around frantically and Peter lost no time in imitating her. They kept dancing, shaking their arms and legs, until Kamala turned around and caught sight of Sarah standing in the doorway. The girl immediately froze, and Peter crashed into her.

“Hey, guys,” Sarah croaked.

Peter cleared his throat awkwardly and Kamala ran a hand through her hair, suddenly self-conscious.

“Hi, Cap,” Kamala finally said.

“Don’t mind me,” Sarah told them. “I was on my way out.”

Kamala and Peter glanced at each other awkwardly. “Huh, we were done anyway,” Kamala said, nodding her head vigorously.

“Right,” Peter agreed. “Duty calls, you know, saving people, hunting things,” he added, nodding his head along with the girl.

Sarah smiled indulgently. “Whatever you say,” she replied before turning around.

The woman had to stifle a laugh when she heard Peter’s yelp of surprise after Kamala punched him in the shoulder.

“Good job, Peter!”

“Hey, it wasn’t my idea!”

Finding out about teenager superheroes had been a surprise, to say the least. Sarah was at least relieved to notice that Kamala and Peter were somewhat adapting to her presence in the mansion and were not as wide-eyed as they had first been when talking to her, listening to her, or being in Sarah’s general vicinity. Sarah had become Captain America out of sense of honor and duty, she would never have imagined becoming a role model for children all over the country. The thought alone was a bit overwhelming.

Surprisingly enough, Sarah was starting to adapt to her new normal. She could scarcely believe that Natasha had taken her under her wing without ulterior motive, providing a most welcome alternative to S.H.I.E.L.D. and a place to stay until Sarah could get her life back on track. Now, Sarah simply needed to find out what that entailed exactly.

Oddly enough, Sarah had trusted Natasha immediately. There was something about the woman that Sarah found fascinating. Dr. Stark might not have the best reputation with S.H.I.E.L.D. but Sarah had seen right through the woman’s façade as soon as they had made it back to the mansion. Sarah had realized that Natasha was very different from her Dr. Stark persona when she had seen her interact with Mr. Jarvis, whom Natasha treated more as an old friend than an employee, and Peter and Kamala, who had their own rooms at the mansion. Sarah was surprised that S.H.I.E.L.D. had not yet managed to recruit them. It seemed that Director Hill was not happy about enhanced people roaming the streets. Sarah had the feeling Natasha had been keeping the kids out of reach.

Sarah had also realized down the line that Natasha had trouble expressing her feelings and did not take thanks well. She also was a true master when it came to make gifts pass up as nothing more than an afterthought. She had given Sarah a cardboard box full of Sarah’s personal effects that Sarah had thought lost forever: photographs, sketchbooks that Sarah had taken with her to Europe and her old compass. Sarah’s heart had skipped at beat at seeing Peggy’s photograph still inside.

All in all, Sarah was getting used to Natasha’s unique brand of caring.

“Say, you like art, right?” Natasha asked Sarah later that day as they were wandering the streets, eating hot dogs and chatting about nothing in particular. The woman had probably noticed Sarah glancing at the building in front of them.

A week ago, Sarah would have thought that they had ended up in front of the Met by chance but she knew better now. She could not help the wide smile that spread over her face as she grabbed Natasha’s arm. “Come on,” she told her enthusiastically, leading the other woman to the entrance of the building.

Sarah glanced at the map and gasped. “It’s so much bigger now,” she pointed out.

“I never really thought about it,” Natasha admitted. “I guess they added a lot of new departments over the years.” Sarah nodded wordlessly. “So, what do you want to see first?”

“Modern Art,” Sarah said resolutely.

“You’re jumping right into it, aren’t you?” Natasha chuckled.

Sarah could not help but gap every time she looked at a new piece. She also could not help but talk Natasha’s ears off about painting techniques, which the other woman probably thought terribly boring.

“Look at this fish,” she exclaimed. “And the flowers,” she added.

“Oh yes, so lifelike,” Natasha deadpanned, which made Sarah laugh for some reason. “Did you use to come here often?” Natasha asked with interest.

Sarah nodded, thinking back at her life before the war. Oddly enough, the memories were not as painful as she would have thought. “I used to sit and draw for hours when I was younger. Bucky would come with me but he would usually get bored fairly quickly and end up chatting up girls while I worked.”

Natasha smiled at her. “I saw some of your drawings,” she said. “You’re really good.”

Sarah looked away. “Thanks,” she mumbled. “I would have loved to go to art school, you know. But after my father died, I had to find a job that actually paid the bills. I didn’t want to be a burden for Bucky and his parents. Then the war happened and art school didn’t seem relevant anymore.”

“You could still go, you know,” Natasha pointed out. “To art school, I mean. If that’s something you really want. Or you could enroll for evening classes.”

Sarah stared at her. “Really?” she asked.

Natasha shrugged. “Of course! That’s one of the perks of this time and age; the sky’s your limit now.”

“That’d be great actually,” Sarah said, smiling at the prospect. “I’m sorry,” she added. “All this must be pretty boring for you.”

“Are you kidding,” Natasha grinned. “I’m not an art fan, I must admit, but this is actually kind of cool. Relaxing, even.” Sarah raised her eyebrow doubtfully. “I promise I won’t start chatting up girls,” Natasha joked.

“I mean, you could,” Sarah told her giddily. Truth was, she still had a hard time wrapping her head around what Daisy and Dr. Simmons had told her.

“Sure, I could,” Natasha answered, smiling. Sarah’s heart skipped a beat. “So, what do you want to see next?”

“Why don’t you chose?” Sarah suggested. “There must be something you want to see while we’re here, right?”

“Well-”

“Yes?”

“I was a bit obsessed with King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table as a kid,” Natasha finally admitted.

Sarah did not need to be told twice and the two women made their way to the Arms and Armor department.

“Is this why you wore an armor?” Sarah dared to ask as she looked at the displays.

Natasha shrugged. “I’ve never thought about it that way actually,” she admitted. Her eyes travelled along the metal pieces, probably analyzing their structure, Sarah thought. “Maybe unconsciously. There’s something oddly fascinating about this time period, don’t you think?” she asked quietly without looking away. Sarah hummed in agreement.

“I would hate to have my head chopped off by one of those,” Sarah noted, pointing at the weapons on display.

“Sure, if you want to get technical about it,” she said, rolling her eyes.

When they went back to the mansion several hours later, Sarah realized she was starting to feel more at ease in her new life. She still felt like she was lacking a purpose but her discussion with Natasha had opened up new opportunities

“I had a wonderful time,” Sarah said. “Thank you, Natasha, really. I needed this.”

“Anytime, Cap.”

When they entered the living room, they found Kamala and Peter playing video games.

“Hey, guys,” Kamala greeted without looking away from the screen.

“I don’t get it,” Peter told her. “Hi, guys- How can you write about people you see every day? Isn’t it awkward?”

Kamala shook her head. “I guess it kind of was a bit, at first, yeah,” she answered. “But now I’ve got tons of reviews about great characterization.”

“Yeah… Isn’t it cheating, though?”

“You’re one to talk,” Kamala countered. “Aren’t you taking pictures of yourself in the suit and selling them?” she asked, staring at the boy steadily. “I least I don’t get paid for what I write- Shit!” she exclaimed when the character on screen collapsed.

“Pay attention to the game!” Peter exclaimed.

 

 

_USA_

_1943_

The first time Sarah had told Bucky about enlisting as a mechanics, he had freaked out. Her wish to join the army and take part in the war effort had been the cause of several arguments since the US had joined the fight. Sarah had been very clear about what she had in mind and Bucky, who would be shipping out in just a few days, was doing everything he could to make her change her mind.

Sarah could not believe she would not get to join the fight for the sole reason of being a woman. Being a mechanics for the army was one of her only options and Bucky had simply not wanted to hear about it.

“You know what they say about female mechanics, right?” he had told her. Sarah had rolled her eyes at him. “Don’t give me that look, punk. I just don’t want you to get in trouble.”

Sarah had shaken her head. “They won’t ask _me_ about this but what about _you_?” she had asked.

“Don’t worry about me, I can be discreet. You on the other hand…”

“Look, I’ll promise not to jump on the first pretty girl I see if you promise to come back in one piece.”

 

 

Sarah woke up feeling cold in the middle of the night, and for a dreadful second she thought she was back under the ice. She choked back a sob and stumbled out of bed, knowing that trying to get back to sleep would be pointless. She made her way to the kitchen as quietly as possible, turned on the kittle and grabbed the box of tea Jarvis had bought for her after finding her in the kitchen in the middle of the night a few days prior. Once the tea was ready, she made her way to the living room, wrapped herself in a blanket and carefully blew on the steaming cup.

She heard Natasha’s footsteps long before the woman came into view. The brunette was still fully dressed and looked like she had not bothered going to bed at all.

“Hey,” Natasha greeted quietly. “Chamomile?” she asked, pointing at the cup in Sarah’s hands.

“Valerian roots,” Sarah told her. “Jarvis got it for me, he thought it would help.” Natasha nodded approvingly before sitting down next to her. “Do you want some?” Sarah asked softly. “I noticed you don’t sleep much.”

“That’s putting it mildly,” Natasha scoffed.

Sarah glanced at her curiously. “Nightmares?” she asked gently. Natasha looked at her in surprise. “I have them too, you know.” Natasha glanced down, avoiding her gaze. “Do you want to talk about it, maybe?” Sarah asked hesitantly.

“Not really,” Natasha said, shaking her head. “I- I usually work until I pass out from exhaustion,” she admitted.

Sarah frowned. “That doesn’t sound healthy,” she pointed out.

“Yeah, well, what’s new?” Natasha scoffed.

Sarah gave her a faint smile before standing up slowly. She went to the kitchen and made another cup of tea for Natasha before sitting down on the couch again. Sarah’s shoulder brushed against Natasha’s as she sat down.

“Here you go,” Sarah whispered.

Sarah took her own cup in her hands and took a sip, all the while glancing at Natasha. The other woman looked exhausted. Sarah had not realized just how bad Natasha’s insomnia really was until that point. She wondered how many years Natasha had spent battling her own demons and nightmares on her own. The woman had taken Sarah in without even bating an eyelash; she had been a mentor to Peter and Kamala, she had been putting everyone else’s wellbeing before her own while she had nobody except Jarvis to take care of her.

Sarah had yet to meet the Avengers, Natasha’s former team, but from what Sarah had gathered from talking to Jarvis, Natasha had given them everything without expecting anything in return. None of them had bothered to make sure she was alright during the years they had spent together. It was high time things changed, Sarah thought.


	4. Summer Days

Natasha felt his presence next to her before the man even opened his mouth. She sighed and looked at the bottom of her empty glass.

“Two whiskeys, on the rocks,” Hammer said.

The bartender nodded and grabbed a bottle from the shelves behind him.

“I’ll have another club soda, thanks,” Natasha told him. The man did not even blink at the sudden change of order. He poured Hammer’s drink and then went on serving Natasha’s.

“Natasha,” Hammer sighed, shaking his head. “You know, you used to be fun.”

“Well, rehab is not as fun as it seems,” Natasha answered curtly.

Natasha took a sip of her drink and hoped that Hammer would go away on his own.

“How’s the foundation doing?” he asked.

Natasha had to fight the urge to roll her eyes. She had spotted Christine Everhart in the crowd and knew better than to cause another scene. Natasha was getting tired of the papers writing about her troublesome life. Natasha was not looking for praises. After all, she had not started fighting crime for glory, and the same could be said about her green-energy projects, but the woman still dared hope the press would lay off her back once in a while.

“The foundation’s doing good, thank you for asking,” she answered with a fake smile. She saw a photographer snap a picture. Tomorrow, the papers would probably be wondering what was in her glass and try to guess what Hammer and her were talking about.

“What is this gala for by the way?” the man asked. “Ending world hunger? Children in need? Animal rescue?” he scoffed.

Natasha’s knuckles turned white around the glass she was holding. “Helping the Asgardians settle on Earth,” she grumbled.

“Of course,” Hammer nodded. “More immigrants. Exactly what this country needs right now.”

Natasha closed her eyes. He’s not worth it, she reminded herself. He’s trying to rile you up. Don’t let him win.

“How’s your company doing?” Natasha suddenly asked. “I heard the army had gone with someone else for their new contract. Not too disappointed, I hope?”

Hammer chuckled and wrapped an arm around Natasha’s shoulders, who stiffened immediately.

Remember the cameras, she told herself.

“Ah, Natasha,” he sighed. “Don’t worry your pretty head for me. I’m touched really, but the army is not really reliable these days. No, I’ve found someone else, someone daring- I could deal you in, you know. You need only just ask.”

“I don’t sell weapons anymore, Hammer,” she felt the need to remind him.

Hammer sighed. “Your loss, my dear.” He patted her shoulder and walked away.

Natasha chugged the rest of her drink and hoped the evening would end quickly.

When Natasha made it back to the mansion, she found Sarah sitting on the couch in the workshop, holding a pen and a sketchbook. The blonde jumped in surprise.

“Natasha, hi, I was just looking for somewhere quiet, I didn’t realize how late it got.”

Natasha smiled. “Cap, when I gave you the access code to the workshop it was my way of saying you can come in anytime you want. Don’t sweat it, okay?”

Sarah seemed to relax immediately and sat back down as Natasha made her way to her. She took a peak at the sketchbook. “Blank page syndrome, huh?” she pointed out.

Sarah made a face. “Yes, it seems I can’t focus long enough to settle on anything.”

Natasha smiled. “I know what you mean.”

“You look really nice, by the way,” Sarah said after a bit.

“Thanks,” Natasha mumbled without looking at the other woman. “Mind if I put on some music?”

“It’s your workshop,” Sarah told her simply.

“Friday, you know what to do,” she said.

Natasha walked to the car waiting patiently in the workshop as AC/DC started playing and opened up the hood. She would usually have waited for Peter to carry on with the car repairs but right now, Natasha needed to clear her mind. She would only need to be careful not leaving grease stain on her red dress.

Natasha could not fathom why Hammer would not leave her alone. It seemed the man took pleasure in riling her up and being insulted in return. Their known ongoing rivalry probably was the only press Hammer was getting these days; he knew how to take advantage of any situation and, as they said, bad press is better than no press at all.

Natasha sighed. The man did not care about charities, or the Maria Stark Foundation, he only cared about himself and the way his actions could impact his public image. Take tonight for example, Natasha would bet anything Hammer did not even give a penny to the charity in charge of helping the Asgardians settle on Earth after the loss of their home world. Why would he? He did not care about Asgard being destroyed and the countless lives lost in the process. He did not care about Asgardians’ civil rights, or providing them with new identities and help them find a job if they wished to. He only cared that the press would think he did.

That man was a worthless piece of-

“Damn it,” Natasha exclaimed as her head bumped violently into the hood of the car.

Her vision blurred for a second as she felt a burning pain run through her. She heard Sarah rush to her side.

“Natasha?” the blonde exclaimed as she held Natasha’s head between her hands. “You’re bleeding.”

“I’m fine,” Natasha mumbled, closing her eyes. “Just hand me that towel,” she said, pointing somewhere to her left, her eyes still closed.

Sarah gently pressed the cloth to Natasha’s forehead. “I should take you to a hospital,” Sarah pointed out.

Natasha scoffed. “I’m fine. Head injuries tend to bleed a lot. It’s not as bad as it looked.”

“It looks plenty bad, believe me,” Sarah said. “Come on,” she added gently, steering Natasha away.

Natasha let Sarah lead her to the car without complaining. Was Sarah even allowed to drive? she wondered. But it was late, and Natasha would not have wanted to wake up Jarvis for a little bump on the head.

She insisted to be taken to Metro-General and hoped that Jane would be on call that night. Natasha was reluctant to admit it, but she really did hate hospitals and medical procedures and Jane was the only one apart from some of her former coworkers who Natasha trusted with her health.

“What did you do this time?” Jane asked as she stopped next to Natasha’s bed, clipboard in hand. She turned to Sarah, probably surprised to find someone beside Jarvis by Natasha’s side. “Hi, I’m Doctor Jane Foster,” she said.

“Sarah,” the blonde answered simply.

Jane did not seem put out by Sarah’s unforthcoming behavior and turned to Natasha again. “Let me guess, you got into a fight during a fancy dinner?” Jane smirked. Natasha glared at her. “Wouldn’t be the first time,” Jane reminded her.

“If you must know, I was working in the workshop and I banged my head against the hood of the car.” Jane made a face. “I should remember to take off the heels,” Natasha mumbled. “The hood was closer than I thought.”

Jane nodded. “Okay, you’re going to need stiches for that,” she said. “And I’m going to need a blood sample. And to check your blood pressure while we’re at it.”

“For a small bump?” Natasha exclaimed. “Jane, come on! This is ridiculous,” she said, trying to stand up.

Jane rested her hand on Natasha’s shoulder and gently pushed her back to the bed. “Your health is important, Natasha,” she said, looking at her softly.

Natasha rolled her eyes. “Come on, who falls for that look.”

“Thor does,” Jane huffed.

“Of course he does,” Natasha snorted. “Alright, do what you must,” she finally mumbled.

Sarah cleared her throat awkwardly. “I’m going to-”

“Stay,” Natasha said before she could change her mind. “I mean, if you want,” she added.

Sarah looked at Jane hesitantly. “Make yourself at home,” the doctor said with a shrug.

Sarah sat down on the other end of the bed as Jane cleaned the wound on Natasha’s forehead.

“How is Thor doing by the way?” Natasha asked.

“He’s doing well considering what happened,” Jane answered. “Been busy trying to sort out… well, everything, actually. He’s been living on Earth for years but the others… I’m worried for them. I can’t imagine what it must be like- loosing your whole planet like that.”

Natasha hummed in agreement and tried not to move her head as Jane started stitching up the wound.

“Thank you for helping them, by the way,” Jane added. “It means a lot to me, and I know it means a lot to Thor as well.”

“It’s nothing,” Natasha dismissed with a shrug.

“Try not to move,” Jane reminded her. “Of course it’s something,” she went on. “Nobody seems to care about Asgardians these days. President Osborn’s doing everything he can to send them packing. I’m surprised it’s taking him so long.”

Natasha sighed. “Don’t worry, there’s nothing he can do right now. People love Thor, and from what I’ve seen, the Asgardians just want to have a quiet life. Osborn’s not going to turn the population against them.”

“They have nowhere else to go,” Jane sighed.

“I know, don’t worry, we’ll find a solution.”

After a few hours lost at the ER for a little bump to the head, Sarah drove Natasha home.

“So, aliens, huh?” Sarah said as Natasha sat on the couch in the living room and tried to wrap herself in a blanket. Sarah chuckled and draped the blanket over Natasha’s feet. “The Asgardians. They’re aliens, right?”

Natasha sighed. “Didn’t S.H.I.E.L.D. have a file on them?” she asked quietly.

“They had one on Thor but I had no idea- I guess I need to start watching the news,” she pointed out.

“Just- Don’t read tabloids and you’ll be golden,” Natasha told her, trying to stifle a yawn.

“I’ll text Miss Potts and tell her you won’t make it to the office today.”

“I’m fine,” Natasha mumbled.

“Natasha, you’re exhausted. Try to get some sleep, okay?”

“Yes Sir!”

Sarah’s eye roll was the last thing she saw before falling asleep.

 

Natasha could hardly believe summer was already upon them. She had been so busy with the company that she had missed the subtle change in weather and the heat rising until it became unbearable. It did not prevent Sarah from going on with her life, Natasha noticed. The woman still got up at dawn to run for miles in the city and had finally enrolled for summer art courses at NYU. The woman was happy to see Sarah adapt so well despite the issues she tried to hide from Natasha, like the fact that the insomnia was far from getting better. During the few months since Sarah had woken up, the two of them had often found themselves in the living room in the middle of the night, watching the news, boring documentaries or even Star Trek reruns if Peter had anything to say about it.

“What is this?” Natasha had asked one night at seeing Peter and Sarah watching TV so late at night. “An insomniac anonymous meeting?”

“I’ve been trying to get Sarah caught up on sci-fi,” Peter had explained without looking away from the screen.

“As if we need more of that in our lives,” Natasha had pointed out. She had sat down between Peter and Sarah on the couch.

“Huh, watch out,” Peter had complained when she had sat on his feet. “Anyway, Star Trek is a classic.”

“True,” Natasha had nodded.

“If you guys could cut the chatter,” Sarah had interrupted.

“I’ve created a monster,” Peter had exclaimed, his eyes going wide.

Natasha found herself smiling as she made her way to the kitchen where Jarvis was cooking dinner.

“Something smells amazing,” she pointed out. She sat on one of the stools near the man, resting her face in the palm of her hand. “What are you making?” she asked.

“Fried chicken,” the man answered. “I’ve found Miss Rogers to be very fond of it. It is a nice change from boiled meat, I dare say.” Natasha frowned. “She may have mentioned a preference for more modern cuisine.”

“You’ve been trading recipes with Captain America?” Natasha asked in disbelief.

“Miss Rogers has shown an interest in modern cooking,” Jarvis informed her.

“Huh, fancy that. I’ve been meaning to take her out sometime, get Thai or something,” Natasha reflected out loud. “Didn’t get around to actually doing it, though.”

“Miss Natasha, if I may-”

“What is it, J.?”

“I would advise caution regarding Miss Rogers,” Jarvis told her softly.

“What do you mean?” Natasha asked.

“It would be ill-advised to form any sort of romantic attachment towards Miss Rogers.”

Natasha gaped at the butler before bursting out laughing. “I’m not going to fall in love with Captain America, don’t be ridiculous.”

“I’m worried about you,” Jarvis admitted. “After Miss Van Dyne left-”

“Janet was a mistake,” Natasha said curtly. “A mistake I don’t plan on doing ever again. Don’t worry, J., I’ve learned my lesson.”

Jarvis stared at her unblinkingly before finally nodding.

“So,” Natasha said. “Can I help with anything?”

“You can cut these apples for the fruit salad.”

The truth was, falling in love with Sarah would be the easiest part of Natasha’s life at the moment and overall a really bad idea. Natasha really did not need the aggravation.

Natasha heard footsteps in the hallway and raised her head when Peter, Kamala and Sarah entered the kitchen.

“Wait until you go to the movies,” Peter exclaimed, walking backward as he talked to Sarah.

“We had movie theatres in the forties, you know,” the blonde reminded him, shaking her head fondly.

“Not like that, you didn’t,” Peter countered.

“You should ask Natasha to take you sometimes,” Kamala cut in.

“What’s going on?” Natasha asked, smiling despite herself. She was always glad to see Peter and Kamala, and summer break usually meant they would spend a little more time at the mansion.

“Sarah hasn’t gone to the movies yet,” Peter explained in outrage as if it were Natasha’s fault.

“You should take her then,” Natasha suggested. “Go watch that new movie you keep talking about, and make sure to see it in 3D,” she added.

Peter and Kamala’s eyes lighted up. “Oh man, it’s going to be great,” Peter exclaimed, grabbing Sarah’s arm. “Come on, let’s go, if we hurry we can catch the next screening.”

“I didn’t mean now,” Natasha chuckled.

“Let me grab my coat,” Kamala said. “You’re coming with us, right?” she then asked, turning to Natasha.

Natasha gave the teen a small smile before shaking her head. “I have some work I need to finish or Pepper will have my head,” she said. Peter and Kamala’s smiles fell at once. “It’s okay guys, go on or you’ll be late.”

Sarah let the kids drag her away, looking plain confused.

“Seems it’ll be only us for dinner,” Natasha told Jarvis.

“It would seem so,” the man sighed.

Natasha shrugged and took a bite of the apple in her hand. “Their loss.”

Natasha was glad that the kids had taken a liking to Sarah. After all, they both would benefit from having a strong role model in their life. Captain America. Natasha had not been surprise to see Howard had not exaggerated Sarah’s… morality. The woman could tell right from wrong with absolute certainty and Natasha had to admit she was a little jealous of Sarah’s confidence. It must have been nice to simply know the best course of action in any circumstances.

Even the fact that her birthday just so happened to be the 4th of July had not surprised Natasha at all. She may have rolled her eyes, though. A lot.

Sarah had not said a word about the upcoming event and Natasha had the feeling the blonde had the same grievance than Natasha about birthdays. The idea that people would give a crap about someone on a particular day was laughable. Nevertheless, Natasha wanted to do something for her new friend and asked Jarvis to bake a cake, in the strictest confidence of course. She would even have made the whole thing look like Jarvis’ idea if she had not been certain Sarah would see right through her bullshit, as usual. How could someone you had just met be able to just get you? Natasha would probably never know.

Peter and May had invited Natasha and Jarvis to spend some holidays with them for the past year and the 4th of July was no exception. May usually insisted to entertain but Natasha had insisted they would spend the day at the mansion instead. May had suggested taking Sarah out of the mansion while Jarvis and Natasha worked on the cake.

Peter and Kamala had taken Sarah shopping a few days before and seemed to have had the time of their life. Sarah had seemed a little shaken by the idea of having a shopping day but had complied with only one speech on consumerism, which Peter and Kamala had actually seemed to agree with. If she was being honest, Natasha tended to agree with them too but Sarah really did need something else to wear than plaid shirts and cargo pants.

The only downside of being born on the 4th of July was the inevitable Presidential speech. Especially when the President was Norman Osborn. Natasha would have forgone the speech entirely if Peter had not been so interested in politics.

“I can’t believe people voted for that guy,” he said, pointing at the TV in disgust. “If they only knew all the shady shit going down at Oscorp Industries these days, I swear-”

“Pete,” May cut in. “Please tell me you’re not trying to take down the President by yourself …”

Peter shrugged. “Kamala’s helping.”

“What?” May exclaimed.

Peter’s eyes got wide. “I mean- Of course not.”

“Peter… Natasha, help me out here,” May said, turning to the other woman.

“Peter, come on, we talked about this,” Natasha said. “If you’re caught hacking into Oscorp’s database you could get into some serious trouble.”

“Not this again,” Peter sighed.

“Yes, this again,” Natasha exclaimed. “Need I remind you how we met in the first place?”

Natasha saw Sarah frown from the corner of her eyes. “How did you two meet? I never asked.”

“I caught him hacking Stark Industries’ files. Tracked him down using his IP address.”

“Really?” Sarah asked.

“I simply wanted to upgrade my webshooters,” Peter explained. “Besides, I’m much better now, I won’t get caught.”

May and Natasha glanced at each other. “I’ll talk to him later,” Natasha whispered, squeezing May’s hand in reassurance.

Peter managed to steer the conversation away from his hacking skills and the rest of the day went on agreeably.

Natasha tried not to think too much about the butterflies in her stomach when she saw Sarah’s radiant smile during the fireworks that evening.

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately,” Sarah said at the end of the show.

Natasha stepped aside to make way for a woman pushing a stroller. “What about?” she asked the blonde.

“About Director Hill’s proposal,” Sarah answered.

“Working for S.H.I.E.L.D., you mean?”

Sarah nodded and Natasha sighed. Sarah’s decision did not come as a surprise to her. She had known Sarah would go back out there eventually, the only question had been to know _when_.

“You’re sure about this, aren’t you?” she asked gently.

“I- I need to do it,” Sarah told her. “Peter’s right. We can’t stand by and do nothing while the world goes to shit. I can’t let the kids do all the work in good conscience.”

Natasha rested a hand on Sarah’s arm. “You can’t stand the injustice of the world, I get it. Believe me, I do. And if you’re sure about joining S.H.I.E.L.D., then I’ll back you up one hundred percent. But please, think about it. You don’t owe them anything. Hell, you don’t owe anything to anyone. You already died for them once, nobody’s asking you to do it again.”

“What good is my life if I don’t do something with it?” Sarah whispered.

Natasha’s heart shattered at the words.

“You’re worth everything,” she told her earnestly. “You were given a second chance. There is no debt to repay. You can simply let go.”

That was practically word for word what Rhodey had told Natasha before she went to rehab. Rhodey always seemed to find the right words and now Natasha could do the same for Sarah.

Sarah smiled at her softly. “Thank you for telling me this, Tasha, but I’m sure of myself this time. I don’t trust Hill but I trusted Peggy and I’m willing to give S.H.I.E.L.D. the benefit of the doubt for now. I just- I can’t go back to a normal life. It’s not who I am anymore. Sure, I had dreams and hopes before the war and for a moment I thought I could go back to that, go back to the person I used to be but I can’t. I’m not this person anymore. I can’t go back. Frankly, I’m not sure I would even want to. I’m adapting more than I thought I would and that’s thanks to you, Tasha. You showed me I had other options. I’m really grateful for that but I can’t sit by and let someone else do the work. That’s just not me.”

“I understand. I’ll call Hill in the morning.”

“Thank you.”

 

Hill agreed to send Daisy Johnson and Lance Hunter to debrief Sarah on S.H.I.E.L.D. policies. Natasha was less than thrilled at the idea of having agents in her house at the moment but Daisy was one of the few of Hill’s lackeys Natasha actually liked. Hunter, on the other hand… she could have made without. Besides, they had a knack for arriving at the wrong time.

Peter, May, Natasha and Sarah, who had just come back from her daily run, were siting down in the kitchen. Natasha was looking worriedly at her watch, hoping that the agents would stick to the time agreed on for the meeting and not barge in while Peter was still in the mansion.

“Peter told me about the convention in Madripoor,” May said, glancing at Natasha.

“So, what do you think?” Natasha asked warily.

“She said I could go with you!” Peter exclaimed exuberantly.

“I think Peter can afford to miss a couple days of school. Besides, going to a convention as part of his internship at Stark Industries will look good on his resume.”

“Let’s not forget I actually helped with the robots we’re going to present there,” Peter reminded them. “We’re working on a secret project to save the Earth,” he told Sarah. The blonde frowned.

“Don’t worry, Cap,” Natasha said. “We’re talking robot bees here. They’re completely harmless.”

“As long as they don't go on a killing spree like the previous one,” a voice said behind them.

Natasha turned around sharply and found Hunter leaning against the doorframe, his arm crossed over his chest.

“I’m sorry Miss Natasha,” Jarvis said from behind the man. “I tried to-”

“It’s fine J.,” Natasha said, without looking away from Hunter.

“Hi there,” Daisy said, waving at them all.

“You’re early,” Natasha said through gritted teeth.

“Yeah, sorry about that, you know how Director Hill gets,” Daisy told her with a smile.

Hunter walked to the table, grabbed a chair and sat on it backwards, giving Natasha a self-satisfied smirk. “So is that the kid genius? Your assistant or something. How old are you kid, fourteen?”

“I’m sixteen,” Peter bristled.

“Ever thought about working for S.H.I.E.L.D.? We can always use another genius.”

“Leave him alone, Hunter,” Natasha growled, glaring at the man.

Daisy stepped in by stepping on Hunter’s foot. “We’re actually here for Captain Rogers,” the brunette reminded him pointedly. “And you should at least try to make a good impression on her.”

“Fine,” Hunter grunted.

Natasha stood up, grabbing Peter’s arm so he had no other choice but to stand up as well. “We’ll leave you to it, then.”

She exited the room with Peter and May and left Sarah alone with the wolves.

“May, I’m sorry,” she said as soon as they were out of earshot. “I didn’t think they would come so early.”

May put her hand on Natasha’s shoulder reassuringly. “I know, Natasha. You’ve been keeping them away from him all this time, and I’m really thankful for that.”

“I don’t want to work for them anyway,” Peter chimed in.

“Well,” May said. “I’m really glad to hear it. Now grab your bag, it’s time we get out of Natasha’s hair for a while.”

Peter nodded and took a step towards the staircase before turning back quickly and planting a kiss on Natasha’s cheek.

“Thank you,” May told her once Peter had disappeared upstairs.

“What for?” Natasha asked.

“Keeping him safe. Guiding him. God knows he needs it.”

“I’m not- I don’t-”

May smiled at her gently. “You know I always worry when he is… out there. But I know that he’s safe with you and safer out there because of you, because of the suit you made for him.”

“I-”

Natasha’s eyes were burning. Fortunately, her cellphone went off and saved her from making a fool of herself. She checked the caller ID and smiled.

“Sorry, May, I really need to take this.” May nodded and followed Peter upstairs as Natasha answered the phone. “Hey, Cassie,” Natasha exclaimed. “How’s San Francisco?”

“Good, good, that’s actually why I’m calling. I’m coming back to New York in the fall. I enrolled at NYU.”

Natasha froze. “Cassie, are you sure about this?”

“I’m sure. I talked it over with my mom and I already swore not to touch another Pym Particle in my life, so don’t worry. I’m fine, I just want to come home.”

“I’m really glad to hear you’re okay, but what about your mom?”

“She’s got a new life in San Francisco now, she’s good a job, even a boyfriend I’m not supposed to know about. She thinks she’s being sneaky but she’s really not. She’s happy there but I miss New York. It’s where I grew up. With dad…” she said, choking up on the word. “And I kinda miss Jarvis’ cooking,” she added.

Natasha chuckled. “You know you’re always welcome here, sweetie. And I know Jarvis misses you too.”

“Thanks, Tasha. I’ll call you when I get there.”

“Looking forward to it. Bye, Cassie.”

“Bye.”

Natasha sighed. She could already imagine Peter’s reaction at hearing that Ant-Man’s daughter would be back in town. How was she supposed to prevent Cassie from meeting her father’s fate while harboring Spider-Man, Ms. Marvel and Captain freaking America?


	5. The women of S.H.I.E.L.D.

_USA_

_1943_

Sarah glanced at Doctor Erskine as he sat on the backseat of the car and let out a weary sigh.

“Where to?” Sarah asked.

“Back to camp, please,” he answered, taking off his hat and running a hand through his hair.

Sarah started the engine. She had finally managed to get a job as a mechanic for the army and had along the line become the personal chauffeur of Doctor Erskine who people said would single handedly change the course of the war. Not that Sarah ever paid attention to latrine rumors anyway.

While they drove, Sarah could not help but glance at the Doctor in the rearview mirror. He seemed exhausted. She bit her lips worryingly.

“Is everything alright, Sir?” she finally asked.

Doctor Erskine took of his glasses and took his time cleaning them up using the bottom of his shirt.

“Can I ask you a personal question, Sarah?” he finally said, putting his glasses back on. Sarah nodded. “Why did you enlist?” Sarah frowned. “My apologies, I shouldn’t have,” the doctor said after a few moments of silence. “It’s been a long day.”

“No, I-” Sarah took a deep breath. “I wanted to do my part,” she told him. “I can’t stand the idea of sitting by and letting others fight for me.”

“Do you wish women were allowed to fight?” he asked, surprised.

“That’s not what I said,” Sarah answered with a smile. “In a perfect world, no one would have to fight and die to protect their country. Unfortunately, this is not the world we live in today and until we manage to make that world a reality, we will have to fight to protect the people we love.”

“Do you have any family? I never asked,” Erskine said gently.

Sarah smiled, thinking of Bucky. “My best friend,” she answered. “He’s like a brother to me. Took me in when I had no one left.”

“Where is he now?”

“Europe,” Sarah sighed. “He shipped off a few days before I got here.”

“I’m sorry to hear it.”

“Sometimes I fear I’ll never see him again,” Sarah whispered.

The man patted her shoulder reassuringly. “I’m sure you will.”

 

Little had she known that her friendship with Doctor Erskine would be the starting point of her journey to become Captain America.

The man had been looking for a subject for his experiment at Camp Leigh for months without managing to find anyone suitable. He had had to put up with Colonel Phillips and the Senators who had granted the funds for the project watching his every move and monitoring his work closely. They had not taken kindly to Erskine choosing Sarah for the Rebirth Project.

“What the hell, use her as a guinea pig if you must,” Colonel Phillips grumbled. “As long as you provide us with real soldiers.”

Doctor Erskine had been her only ally at Camp Leigh before getting killed by a Hydra agent.

“What are we going to do now?” Senator Brant asked, pointing at Sarah. “Why did you let him do the procedure on her?”

“I didn’t have much of a choice,” Colonel Phillips bristled.

The Senator pinched the bridge of his nose. “We can still salvage this, use the image, hire an actor, anything.”

“What about her?” Colonel Phillips asked, pointing at Sarah, not caring at all of what she had to say on the matter.

“What do you mean ‘What about her’? Send her back home, I don’t care.”

Sarah’s heart skipped a beat.

“I can’t let her walk around looking like this!” Colonel Phillips exclaimed. “She’s a security risk and our only way of ever replicating the serum.”

The senator froze. “True. Let me think about this.”

After Erskine’s death, nobody in the army showed any interest in what she had to say. Except Peggy Carter. The agent had stood up for her, insisting on the fact that they could not afford to lose an asset. Colonel Phillips had not been thrilled about the idea of having Sarah following them to Europe but had finally given in. Sarah had the feeling the man had grown too tired of hearing about her. He had started to tolerate her presence as long as she kept her mouth shut. However, that was simply not in Sarah’s nature.

 

 

 

“Not this again,” Sarah sighed in defeat as she stepped into the living room. Kamala and Cassie turned twin shit eating grins to her and Kamala went as far as turning up the volume of the TV.

“President Osborn wants to make sure America remains great.”

Sarah had to look away from the screen, still not used to seeing herself on TV. The whole ordeal had been blown out of proportion by the media. A journalist had asked her what Sarah thought of the fact that Osborn often took her as an example of nationalism and patriotism and Sarah had just snapped.

“America is nothing without its ideals. Its commitment for the freedom of _all_ people. Don’t let him trick you into thinking any different. President Osborn’s policies are betraying everything America has always stood for: freedom for all and above all the opportunity to start over, to make a better life for yourself and your family. We should extend this courtesy to all Asgardians who had no other choice but to come here. Don’t let him take your humanity and empathy away from you.”

She knew she had shocked a lot of people that day. The speech had been cut short by Hunter, who had put his hand on one of the cameras while Daisy had gently led her away from the crowd. S.H.I.E.L.D. had issued an official statement making it clear that Sarah’s opinions did not reflect those of the organization. Director Hill had been pissed, to say the least.

“For what it’s worth, I think you did the right thing,” Cassie told her gently.

Sarah smiled at the girl. “Thanks, Cassie.”

“Besides, I think you’ve earned a few brownie points for standing up to that douchebag,” Kamala added.

“I hope it’ll make the haters go away,” Cassie said quietly.

“How are we doing on that front?” Kamala asked.

“Same old, same old,” Cassie answered, rolling her eyes. “So now you want us to believe Captain America was a woman all along?” she said in a low-pitched voice, shaking her head. “They’re ruining my childhood! Those damn feminazis!”

“Yeah, that’s disgusting,” Kamala mumbled.

Sarah made a face. “What the hell is a feminazi?” she asked in disbelief.

“Oh, that’s what they call radical feminists these days.”

“Yeah, that what I thought,” Sarah sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “You know what? The only reason these people have never seen real Nazis up close is because of me!” she exclaimed. “Because of what I did for them! They should think twice about saying things like that!”

“Hear, hear,” Cassie exclaimed.

“It’s not my fault women were not allowed to fight!” Sarah went on, unable to stop now that she had started. She noticed Natasha stepping inside the room and glancing at the three of them curiously. “It wasn’t my idea to pose as a man! Shit, this is all Osborn’s fault, if he wasn’t such a-”

“Worthless piece of shit?” Cassie supplied with a smile.

“Did you hear what he said about- about traditional family values?” Sarah added, thinking about one of his most recent addresses. “If he only knew how close I got to getting discharged,” she scoffed.

“What do you mean?” Cassie asked.

“I’m bi,” Sarah told her. “I mean, that’s the word Daisy used.”

“Why am I not surprised,” Cassie said with a smirk.

“Maybe I should come out,” Sarah wondered out loud. “Give them something to really freak out about.”

Kamala’s eyes went wide in surprise. “That would be so cool.”

“That would be a disaster,” Natasha chimed in. “Cap, I really don’t want to be the one to rain on your parade – quite literally might I add – but things are not as simple as they seem.”

Sarah sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “Yeah, you’re right, I know. But I’ve already been on a few dates since I came back, and now that everyone knows I’m back, they’re bound to talk about it to the press at some point.”

Natasha sighed in defeat. “Well, you’re not wrong. At least you could handle it better than I did.”

“What do you mean?” Sarah asked.

“She got caught with her pants around her ankles, if you catch my drift,” Cassie stage-whispered.

“Cassie!” Natasha exclaimed as Kamala blushed furiously. “It was not that bad, I promise,” Natasha added. “The papers published a picture of me making out with an older woman.”

“It was more than just making out,” Cassie pointed out. “You had your hand-”

“I think I get the idea,” Sarah cut in.

“I mean you shouldn’t do it to get back at Osborn. And I think you should tell Hill first before she decides you’re more trouble than it’s worth.”

Sarah made a face. “She was pretty pissed about the whole press thing,” she acknowledged.

“You can’t have Captain America going around talking about patriotism and human rights,” Natasha pointed out sarcastically.

“If she can’t talk about that, what is she supposed to talk about?” Kamala asked.

“Nothing, if Hill had her ways,” Natasha explained. Kamala nodded slowly.

“I can’t help it,” Sarah admitted sheepishly. “Peter calls it my Captain America mode.”

Cassie tried to stifle a giggle.

“You should have heard her when we told her about anti-vaxxers,” Kamala whispered.

“Polio is not sexy,” Sarah said at once.

“Oh my god,” Cassie whispered, delighted.

“Okay guys, I think that’s enough for today,” Natasha cut in, grabbing Sarah’s arm. “Come on, I think you need to hit the gym. I repaired the punching bag and threw in some reinforced webbing while I was at it.”

Sarah let Natasha lead her away from the room. “I’m sorry about the punching bag, by the way,” she said quietly.

Natasha snorted. “Yeah, don’t worry about it, I had planned to change it anyway.”

“No, you hadn’t,” Sarah pointed out.

“Well, it was getting kind of old, you know.”

Once they reached the gym, Natasha threw some hand wrap at Sarah who caught it instinctively and started to wrap her hands.

“So, do you know when your next mission is?” Natasha asked as Sarah landed the first blow. The punching bag moved with a clang but the new webbing seemed to hold in place.

“In a few days,” Sarah answered. “I have no idea where we’re going though, Hill is waiting the last moment to debrief us as usual. I hate that.”

“She’s trying to prevent leaks,” Natasha told her sagely.

“I know,” Sarah grunted, landing another blow. “It’s just- I have a high security level but I still feel like she’s hiding things from me.”

“That’s because she probably is.”

“She likes compartmentalizing,” Sarah scoffed.

“I take it you don’t trust her,” Natasha guessed.

“Not one bit.”

“And yet you’ve been working for her for two months,” Natasha reminded her.

“I don’t trust her but S.H.I.E.L.D. is my only option at the moment,” Sarah said.

“You could join the Avengers,” Natasha told her.

Sarah froze and caught the bag between her hands. “You mean, move to California?” she asked, frowning. “I-” She tried to swallow around the lump in her throat. “I hadn’t realized that- I know I overstayed my welcome,” she finally said. “I’ll get out of your hair.”

Natasha’s eyes went wide in surprise and the woman immediately grabbed Sarah’s arm to stop her from turning away. “That’s not what I meant,” she said at once. “I just- I know how much this means to you, Cap. And if you ever decide to leave S.H.I.E.L.D., you should know that the Avengers would be thrilled to have you.”

“I don’t want to join the Avengers, Natasha,” Sarah sighed. “I don’t know them. I don’t trust them.”

“You don’t trust Maria Hill either,” Natasha pointed out.

“No, but I trust you,” Sarah told her earnestly.

Natasha snorted. “Terrible idea, if you ask me.”

Sarah shook her head and smiled. “I don’t believe that for a second. Now, come on,” she said. She grabbed some hand wrap and a pair of gloves and thrusted them into Natasha’s hands. “A little exercise will do you some good.”

Natasha rolled her eyes at her but dutifully started wrapping her wrists.

 

If Sarah had not known better, she would have thought Maria Hill was straight up trolling her at that point.

“What do you mean she want us to go to Madripoor?” Sarah asked Coulson in disbelief as the man briefed the team.

“We’ve been tracking down A.I.M. for months and we think they’ll be in Madripoor this week for a-”

“A convention,” Sarah cut in. She thought about Natasha and Peter being there when it would all go down. “Aren’t we endangering civilians?” she asked.

Coulson frowned. “We’ll take every necessary steps to ensure the safety of civilians,” he stated.

Sarah rolled her eyes. She hated S.H.I.E.L.D.’s mumbo jumbo.

“Worried about your girlfriend, are you?” Jess Drew asked her, raising her eyebrows.

“Doctor Stark is not my girlfriend,” Sarah said for what felt like the hundredth time.

“You still haven’t asked her out then?” Daisy asked.

Bobby scoffed. “She’s too chicken to make a move.”

“Can we focus on the mission?” Sarah growled. She glared at her team until they all averted their eyes. “Thank you. Who’s our target?” Sarah asked Coulson.

Coulson pressed some keys on the computer and a picture of a browned-hair middle-aged man wearing a designer suit and a pair of glasses appeared on screen.

“Justin Hammer,” Sarah growled. She had heard enough of the man from Natasha to know what type of man he was. “What has he to do with all this?” she asked, dreading the answer.

“We have reasons to think that A.I.M. has recruited him a few months ago,” Coulson explained evenly. “A good thing they did, it gives us the perfect opening to know what they are up to.”

“Let me guess, something evil?” Daisy cut in.

“Arms trafficking?” Jess added. “What else is new?”

“Cute,” Sarah told them. “Why haven’t you managed to catch them yet, then?”

“Justin Hammer is the only lead we’ve had in months,” Coulson cut in. “We need to know what he knows without him knowing about it.”

“Don’t worry, we’ve got this,” Daisy told him.

Coulson glanced at Sarah. “And don’t let… personal feelings get in the way of the mission,” he added.

Sarah crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the man. “I won’t.”

Coulson nodded and left the room.

“Alright, let’s go,” Sarah told the team. “Daisy, you’ll be piloting the jet.”

“Sure,” the younger girl said. “Seriously though, you should really ask her out. The sooner the better.”

Then, she stepped out of the room. Jess and Bobby both gave Sarah a knowing look before following their teammate.

“Let’s just focus on the mission,” Sarah called after them.

Sarah’s team was the best she could have asked for. Daisy had been the first agent Sarah had met upon waking up and her first impression of the girl had turned out to be true. Daisy was just as easy going as she looked but more lethal than anyone could imagine. Sarah had barely flinched the first time Daisy had used her abilities to prevent one of their targets from running away. She was not the first Inhuman Sarah had seen, although she could not let Maria Hill know who Kamala was. The Director might have tried to recruit her, just like she would try to recruit Peter. Sarah had the feeling Maria Hill knew Peter Parker was Spider-Man and simply chose not to do anything about it. Perhaps because Natasha was standing in her way, Sarah could not be sure.

Maria Hill, Sarah had noticed, was fine with enhanced people as long as she knew exactly where they were at any given time or if they accepted to work for her. Many S.H.I.E.L.D. agents were in fact enhanced in some way or other and, from what Sarah had gathered, Maria Hill had even tried to convince the Avengers to work for the agency, to no avail.

“We’ll need to plant the bug on Hammer as soon as possible,” Jess said, tearing Sarah away from her thoughts. “We’ll be able to listen on anything that’s happening undetected.”

“Good,” Sarah nodded. “Once we get there, Bobby will plant the bug. Jess – you and I will check the perimeter. And Daisy, you’ll stay in the jet, hack into the surveillance cameras and be our eyes and ears. Any questions?”

“Will we get to go to the beach afterwards?” Daisy asked.

Sarah tried to fight off a smile and turned to the screen displaying the jet’s location. They would soon be landing and Sarah could not help feeling anxious over the mission. She knew it had nothing to do with her skills as an agent, she was simply worried about Natasha getting caught in the crossfire.

 

She had not been looking for Natasha in the crowd. She had not. The woman was simply hard to miss. Sarah made sure that her hair covered her earpiece and that the cap on her head was in place as she wandered the room, looking for anything suspicious.

“We’ve been here for hours and Hammer hasn’t done anything except give a shitty PowerPoint presentation,” Daisy said through the com, sounding bored out her skull. “How can we be sure he’s here with A.I.M.?”

“We’re not,” Jess chimed in. Sarah spotted her teammate on the other side of the hall, looking at a robot on display. Sarah had to give it to her, the woman was truly an expert in the art of blending in.

“Keep your eyes open,” Sarah said.

She walked aimlessly until she came to a stop right next to Natasha. The other woman did not look up from her phone as she said, “I hope you’re not here to arrest me.”

Sarah had to stop herself from smiling. “Why? Do you have something to confess?” she said, looking straight ahead.

Natasha snorted. “I should have known Hill would send someone here. At least tell me you’re here to arrest Hammer, he’s been creepier than usual.”

“I can’t discuss an ongoing investigation,” Sarah said, well aware that Daisy was listening in and probably recording everything they were saying.

“Of course you can’t,” Natasha said matter-of-factly.

“Be careful, okay?”

“I can handle myself.”

“Cap,” Daisy said suddenly. “We have a problem. I’ve lost Hammer.”

“What? How?”

“Someone’s jamming the cameras.”

“Shit. Bobby, Jess, cover the exists. I’m going to the roof. Daisy, I need those cameras up and running, you hear me?”

“I’m on it.”

If Hammer knew they were onto him, the whole operation was compromised. Sarah ran to the roof just in time to see Hammer being pushed inside a helicopter by a man in a black mask.

“What the hell,” Sarah groaned. “Bobby, Jess, I need back up. Now.”

Sarah launched toward them, grabbed Hammer’s arm and pushed him away from the helicopter with one hand while she threw a punch at the masked man with the other. The man jumped out of the way with surprising speed, trying to reach Hammer. Sarah was not going to let him do that. The man did not look like one of A.I.M.’s goons, there was something dark and menacing about him. He was death himself. For a split second, Sarah remembered a story she had heard after joining the organization. A ghost story. She had the feeling she had found the ghost in question.

Fortunately, Jess and Bobby made it to the roof a few minutes later. Bobby immediately knocked down the pilot and started to shut down the helicopter while Jess led Hammer back inside the building.

As he blocked all her attacks one after the other, Sarah started to wonder how much time she would be able to keep up with the soldier in front of her.

“Bobby!” she called without taking her eyes away from her opponent.

The man threw a punch, hitting Sarah in the face. The force of the impact made her lose her footing and she collapsed on the ground. Rolling over, she managed to get back up and immediately got into a fighting stance. The man launched himself at her again and the two of them fell heavily to the ground. Something was wrong. Sarah should have been able to stop him by now but he was stronger than she would have imagined. He might even be just as strong as she was, she realized suddenly. If someone had managed to get hold of the serum…

Sarah threw her knee in his stomach and managed to get him off her long enough to land a series of strong blows to his face. The glasses shattered, the mask was thrown away and Sarah suddenly stopped breathing. Right there on the pavement, snarling at her viciously, was Bucky. He took advantage of her moment of doubt to send her flying away.

That was not possible, she thought. Bucky had died. She had watched him fall to his death. How could he…

“Cap!” Bobby exclaimed as she grabbed the sticks concealed under her shirt.

“No, wait!”

To be honest, Sarah was not sure whom she had been trying to protect. In the end, she did not have to make that call as two S.H.I.E.L.D. agents she identified as Sam Wilson and Natasha Romanoff landed graciously on the roof. Romanoff immediately launched at Bucky and Sarah could only watch as the three agents finally managed to pin him to the ground. Wilson landed the final blow and Bucky crumbled to the floor, unconscious.

“Thanks for the assist,” Romanoff told Bobby. “We didn’t realize you would be here.”

“Is that the Winter Soldier?” Bobby asked in disbelief.

“Yep,” Wilson said. “Been on his tail for months. I can’t believe we finally caught him.”

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Romanoff cut in. “We still need to take him back to HQ. Mind if we take your jet? We had to park ours on the other side of the city.”

“Sure,” Bobby said. “Hey, Cap, you okay?”

Sarah tore her gaze away from Bucky. “What does Hill want with him?” she asked angrily.

“Are you kidding?” Wilson scoffed. “That’s the Winter Soldier, one of the most dangerous killer in the world.”

“You’re not taking him anywhere,” Sarah snapped, marching towards Wilson and Romanoff.

Romanoff pointed her weapons at her without blinking.

“Wow, everybody calms down,” Bobby exclaimed, stepping between them. “Cap, we have our own assignment,” she reminded Sarah.

“We’re taking him back to Hill,” Wilson told her. “If you have a problem with that take it up to her.”

Sarah glared. “Believe me, I will.”


	6. The River of Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is taken from that amazing speech – you know the one. “When the mob and the press and the whole world tells you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth and tell the whole world… ‘No, you move’.”

Natasha and Peter both glanced up when they heard someone knocking on the door of the hotel room. Natasha frowned, stood up slowly and opened the door slightly to take a peak outside. She smiled when she saw Sarah standing in the corridor.

“I was wondering where you had run off to,” Natasha told her, opening the door to let her in. She froze when she saw Sarah’s red eyes. “Hey, are you okay?”

Sarah shook her head wordlessly before burring her face into Natasha’s neck.

The woman saw Peter stand up quickly. “I’m going back to my room,” he said, pointing at the door. “Bye.”

Natasha turned her attention back to Sarah. She had no idea what to do. She had never seen Sarah cry before, even during their late-night meetings when neither of them could sleep. She had never seen her look so vulnerable.

Natasha wrapped both arms around Sarah’s waist and led her as gently as possible towards the bed, where they both sat down. Natasha gently brushed some strands of hair away from Sarah’s face and rested her hand against her cheek.

“Want to tell me what happened?” she asked softly.

When Sarah finally looked at her, Natasha’s heart broke into a million pieces.

“Bucky is alive,” Sarah whispered. “He’s the Winter Soldier.”

Natasha tried to not let any emotion show on her face. She could not let Sarah know how painful hearing about the Winter Soldier was for her.

“What do you mean?” she asked, trying to keep her voice even.

Sarah glanced at her before looking down to the ground. Natasha had the feeling the blonde had no problem reading her even when she wanted to conceal her thoughts.

“You know about him,” Sarah stated.

There was no point trying to lie to her, Natasha realized.

“Yes,” she sighed.

“I- Did he- He didn’t hurt you, did he?” Sarah asked, looking frantic.

Natasha ran a hand through her hair. “I think he might have killed my parents,” she finally said.

Sarah turned white as a sheet. “Natasha, I-” she choked up. “I didn’t know.”

“I didn’t know who he was,” Natasha assured her. “I would have told you if I had.”

“I know you would have, Hill on the other hand…”

“What happened?” Natasha asked gently, taking Sarah’s hands in her own.

“We were tailing Hammer,” Sarah started.

“So you _were_ here for Hammer,” Natasha cut in.

Sarah nodded. “Yeah, he’s been working for A.I.M. for months. We thought he would lead us straight to them but someone else was after him.” Natasha nodded. She had the feeling she knew where this was heading. “I fought him… Bucky. He was trying to take Hammer away. He was so strong. I was barely keeping up with him. Then Romanoff and Wilson came in, said they had been chasing him for months and just took off with him.”

Natasha stared at her friend, trying to process what had happened.

“If Bobby hadn’t been there to stop me, I don’t know what I would have done. I know they’re all following Hill’s orders but I- I can’t believe he’s alive,” she said, her eyes watering. “I never thought I would see him again and now…”

“Come here,” Natasha said softly, wrapping her arms around Sarah, rubbing her back gently. “You need to have a talk with Hill. There’s a good chance she didn’t know his true identity,” she said, trying not to let her anger towards the Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. show.

“Even if she did, she wouldn’t have told me,” Sarah countered.

“You’re probably right. But you can’t jump to conclusions. You need to talk to her first.”

She felt Sarah nodding against her shoulder. “I know you’re right, I’m just so-”

“Pissed off?”

“Confused.”

“Your team is still here, right?” Natasha asked.

Sarah looked up. “Yes, we need to take Hammer back to HQ. They’re all waiting for me.”

“Do you want me to come back with you?” Natasha offered.

“Your presentation is tomorrow,” Sarah reminded her.

“I could skip it.”

Sarah shook her head. “No, it’s too important. I’ll manage. Don’t worry about me.”

“A little too late for that,” Natasha told her with a weak smile. “Promise me you won’t do anything rash.” The blonde looked away. “Sarah.”

“I promise.”

“We’ll sort this mess out, okay?”

Sarah looked at her in disbelief. “Why would you want to help? If he did kill your parents then-”

Natasha sighed and squeezed Sarah’s hands. “Because you care about him and I care about you. I know how important family can be. I’ll help you get your brother back.”

 

Natasha had all the trouble in the world staying focus on their presentation the next day and did a very poor job of hiding that fact from Peter.

“What happened yesterday?” He asked casually over breakfast. “Cap looked in pretty bad shape.” Natasha did not look up from her plate. “Is S.H.I.E.L.D. give her trouble or...”

“Peter,” Natasha said curtly. She looked up at the teen and sighed. “She's had to deal with some… unforeseen events,” she explained, knowing that Peter would probably not be satisfied by her vague answer. She could not tell him the truth. However, she did not want him so start snooping around in S.H.I.E.L.D.’s highly secured database to try to find the answers he needed by himself.

“You know what, I'm going to be an adult about this and let it go for now,” Peter told her suddenly.

“You are?” she asked, with a pointed look. Peter nodded. “Just, don't hack into their database, alright? We don't need to give them more reasons to try and recruit you.”

"Sure."

For some reason, Natasha did not believe him at all.

 

Their presentation had been a hit, something Natasha - with all her self-assurance - had genuinely not been expecting. Who would have thought robot bees would appeal to the unique audience of Madripore.

They might have already been thinking about weaponizing her invention. However, Natasha had been thinking about that possibility. Peter had been surprised by the lines of code she had added to the program to prevent overrides of any sort. She had shocked him by highlighting the possibility of using the bees for biological warfare. To spread diseases, for instance. Peter had not thought about that possibility and Natasha hoped he would never come to a point in life where he had to second-guess every one of his decisions.

Sarah had not reappeared after her mission in Madripore and Natasha was starting to get worried about the other woman. Who knew what Hill would do to her if she suddenly got the idea that Sarah was not worth the trouble after all?

In the meantime, Natasha had continued renovating the house. The house had not felt like home for years but now, with the help of Peter, Kamala, Cassie and Sarah it was finally starting to. The last step to get rid of the ghost of her father was to renovate his old office. Natasha had not set foot in the room since her parents had died. She had left it just as it had been when they were still alive. She did not have had the strength to open the door until now.

Peter and Cassie followed her inside, each of them carrying cardboard boxes.

“What should we take away?” Cassie asked after a moment.

Natasha ran her hand on the bookshelves. She grabbed a picture of her parents and her, smiling at the camera. That one had been taken by Jarvis on a Christmas morning, and was one of the rare pictures of the three of them that had not featured in the papers.

“Everything,” she finally said, turning towards them. They glanced at her in surprise. “We’re going to take everything away and then repaint the walls. Light blue, what do you think? I’m sure Sarah could use the space, set up an art studio or something. I mean, if she ever comes back.”

Peter squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. “I’m sure she’ll be back soon.”

“She’s been gone a long time,” Cassie pointed out. Peter glared at the girl. “She’s just busy with work,” the girl said, nodding vigorously. “She’ll come back soon.”

Natasha nodded slowly. The kids had no idea what was going on. She hated lying to them but what else was she supposed to do? Natasha was not even supposed to know about Bucky’s arrest. She was not supposed to know the Winter Soldier’s first name for crying out loud. Besides, Cassie had her own problems, dealing with her own loss and trying to move on after her father’s death. Natasha remembered only too well what had happened when Cassie had decided she would be the one avenging her father’s death and had almost died in the process. She was not going to add Sarah’s family issue to Cassie’s heavy burden.

Natasha turned to the bookshelves again. “Let’s start with this, alright? And kids, feel free to take any book you want. I’m not using them anyway.”

 

Sarah did reappear after a while. Natasha had been busy with Stark Industry business, which had helped keep her mind away from more unpleasant S.H.I.E.L.D.-related concerns, and was getting ready for an evening out the night Sarah finally made her way back home.

“Try not to antagonize anyone,” Jarvis told Natasha as he pinned her hair in place.

Natasha chuckled. “Don't worry, I doubt Hammer will resurface anytime soon and without him there's no reason for me to get in trouble.”

Jarvis raised his eyebrows. “My mistake, that brown-haired woman I saw in the paper slapping a senator a few years ago did look an awful lot like you.”

“He kept propositioning me!” Natasha exclaimed. “With his wife right there in the room! _And_ his mistress!”

“Yes of course,” Jarvis said. “How gauche of him.”

Natasha shook her head, partly amused, partly exasperated by her butler's repartee.

A sudden knock on the door put a stop to the conversation.

“Come in,” Natasha exclaimed at once.

Her heart skipped a beat when she saw Sarah standing on her doorway.

“Cap! You’re back!” Natasha exclaimed, looking at Sarah through the mirror.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Sarah said, still standing awkwardly in the doorway.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Natasha said. She would have turned around but Jarvis was still putting pins in her hair. “Come in, come in.”

“You look great,” Sarah told her before looking away, embarrassed.

Natasha chuckled. “Thanks. How are you? The kids missed you, you know.”

Sarah smiled. “Yeah, I missed them too.”

Natasha saw the blonde glance at Jarvis uneasily. “Thanks, J. I’ll take it up from here,” Natasha said, looking at Jarvis pointedly.

“Of course,” the man said. “Have a good evening.”

“Thanks,” Natasha said. Then, she turned around and looked at Sarah. “How are you?” she asked again.

Sarah sighed. Natasha immediately stood up and took Sarah’s hands, leading her to the bed where they both sat down.

“I’m glad to be back home,” Sarah told her finally. She ran her hand through her hair and sighed again.

“You look exhausted,” Natasha noted.

One of these days, Director Hill would have an accident, Natasha decided. She would trip and fall off a helicarrier, or get stuck in a trash compactor or get blasted in the face. Nobody would be able to link it back to Natasha.

“I- I don’t want to talk about it right now,” Sarah told her, pressing her hand to her eyes.

“I get it,” Natasha said, looking around the room for a distraction. “Hey, you know what you need, a night out and dinner. My treat. I mean, the mayor is paying but you know what I mean.”

“Right, the gala,” Sarah nodded.

“You know about that?” Natasha asked in surprise.

“Sure,” Sarah said. “You know there’s this great invention called the Internet, you can read newspapers online now,” she added with a smirk.

Natasha rolled her eyes. “Very funny, Grandma. Come on,” she exclaimed, jumping on her feet. “Go get ready, we’ll be fashionably late.”

 

Natasha did not remember having that much fun during a boring gala in years. Sarah’s presence made everything better but Natasha was not ready to deal with that train of thoughts. At least not tonight.

“Who’s that woman looking at you?” Sarah asked, glancing at a blonde woman in a bright green dress on the other side of the room.

“Christine Everhart,” Natasha said. “Wrote a piece about me a few years ago. She’s a good journalist. Too bad she doesn’t like me very much.” Sarah raised an eyebrow at her. “I might have slept with her,” Natasha told her.

“Might have?” Sarah asked, trying and failing not to smile.

“Alright, I definitely have,” Natasha admitted, rolling her eyes.

“Before or after she wrote the article?”

“Before,” Natasha mumbled. “Not my finest moment, I know.”

“You don’t say,” Sarah smirked.

Natasha saw the woman in question make her way to them and strengthened her back immediately. “Okay, act natural.”

Sarah snorted in her glass.

“Captain America,” Christine Everhart greeted. “I had no idea you were going to be here tonight. Christine Everhart,” she said, extending a hand for Sarah to shake.

“A pleasure to meet you, and please, call me Sarah.”

Damn, she did not even have to try to be charming, did she? Natasha thought.

“Miss Everhart,” Natasha greeted. “Having a pleasant evening, I hope?”

The woman gave her a look. “You know some of us are actually here to work,” she told Natasha curtly. Then, turning back to Sarah, she smiled and said, “I would love for you to feature in our Powerful Women issue. Could we set up a meeting? Our readers would love to know more about our national hero.”

Sarah frowned. “Why do you need a special issue on powerful women?” she asked. “I thought we were supposed to be equals by now.”

Natasha chuckled. She saw Christine’s eyes light up and knew she had to take Sarah out of there before Christine dug her claws into her. “Well, equality is a work in progress,” she told Sarah. “We’ll get back to you for that interview,” she said, steering Sarah away. “Or not,” she added once they were out of earshot.

“Thanks,” Sarah said. “I know I’m not supposed to be talking to the press.”

“No problem. Word of advice though, try not to say anything to them. Ever. Alright? They like to blow things out of proportion.”

“Yeah, I realize that. It’s just that I-”

Natasha bit her lips, trying not to smile. “You can’t help yourself, I know.”

“I’m glad you think this is funny,” Sarah said without heat. The way she was frowning made Natasha chuckle. “How do you deal with all this?”

Natasha shrugged. “I’ve been dealing with this for as long as I can remember. I’m used to it by now.”

 

When both women went to bed later that night, Natasha should have known they would eventually find themselves on the couch watching reruns and unable to get back to sleep. She shifted a bit closer to Sarah. Good god, that woman was a furnace. Natasha closed her eyes for a moment.

Waking up the next morning with a crick in her neck made Natasha wonder why she had spent so much money on renovating her bedroom when she had not been able to sleep in her own bed for months.

Then, the woman opened her eyes slowly and her breath caught at seeing Sarah’s head securely resting on her shoulder. The blanket had been wrapped around the two of them, no doubt by Jarvis, who was nowhere in sight.

Some strands of Sarah’s blond hair were falling on her face and Natasha had to resist the urge the gently brush them away.

Sarah’s eyes fluttered open. A warm smile spread over her face when she saw Natasha.

“Morning,” she mumbled without removing her head from Natasha’s shoulder. “How did you sleep?”

“Good,” Natasha answered after a bit. It was the best night’s sleep she had had in months. “You?”

“Good,” Sarah told her quietly. “Maybe next time we’ll manage to move this to an actual bed.”

“Why, Captain,” Natasha could not help but tease. “How forward of you!”

“I would never…” Sarah said at once.

“Relax, Cap. I know you wouldn’t,” she said before getting up.

“Natasha?” Sarah called. She turned around and looked at the blonde. “Have a good day.”

“Thanks, Cap,” she smiled.

Natasha was about to walk out of the living room when Peter came in through the window, still in his Spider-Man suit and looking more than a little rumpled.

“Peter, what you got there?” Natasha asked, pointing at the orange cat in Peter’s arms. “And don’t say a smoothie,” she warned.

Peter removed his mask. “Isn’t he super cute?” the boy asked eagerly. “Kamala found him in an abandoned warehouse last night. I thought we could keep him here, May is allergic to cats,” he added quickly.

Natasha raised an eyebrow at him. “Why didn’t Kamala left it there?” she asked.

Peter gaped in horror. “Come on, Nat! They were probably about to do some evil experiments on him!” he said, going all misty-eyed at the idea.

Natasha rolled her eyes. “And how on Earth did you end up with it? If Kamala rescued it, then it’s her responsibility.”

“She’s dealing with a gigantic teleporting dog, I think she has enough on her plate already.”

“Wait what?” Natasha asked. “Never mind, I don’t want to know.” Peter stared at her pleadingly. “Alright,” Natasha agreed at last. Peter let out a whoop. “But he’s your responsibility, okay?”

Peter nodded eagerly and jumped into Natasha’s arms. “Thank you, thank you, thank you. You won’t regret it.”

Natasha petted the cat’s head absently. She felt the animal purr and head bump her hand eagerly.

“Hey, can you watch him while I go to the pet store?” Peter asked as Sarah made her way to them, looking curious. Natasha stared at Peter, speechless. “Great,” Peter said as he handed the cat over to her. “Bye, Nat! Bye, Cap!”

“What’s up with him?” Sarah asked in amusement.

“You’re not allergic to cats, are you?” Natasha asked her.

Sarah gave her a surprised look before shaking her head. “Serum,” she answered simply.

“Of course,” Natasha said with an eye roll.


	7. All I can think about

Sarah was getting mixed signals. It made her head spin trying to understand the way Natasha behaved around her. It was hard not getting her hopes up when Natasha did things such as setting Sarah an art studio in her father’s old office or working to improve her suit and her shield. Peter had been the first one to plant the idea in her head that Natasha might like her back.

When he had seen the improvement Natasha had made to the suit, he had exclaimed: “Wow, she must really like you!”

Sarah had stared at him, confused and unable to speak.

“Yeah, that’s how she shows she cares,” Peter had said. “Don’t worry, it took Kamala a while to get it too.”

Sarah was dealing with some unrequited feelings on the one hand and Hill’s secrecy on the other. Sarah had not been able to see Bucky since Romanoff and Wilson had brought him in. Hill would no allow it, no matter how much time Sarah spent in the Director’s office, yelling at her about the fair treatment of prisoners. Hill had sent her away on another assignment, and Sarah had suspected Hill was set on using any excuses to get Sarah as far away from Bucky as possible. Even Daisy and Coulson had not been able to help her sneak into his cell. They had tried to help at least, that was all she could ask of them.

Sarah could not get a break on any front. When she was at home, everything reminded her of her best friend sitting in a cell in a secret S.H.I.E.L.D. facility. When she was with S.H.I.E.L.D., she was reminded by Daisy that she needed to hurry up and ask Natasha out before someone new came and snatched her away. However, Sarah was not going to take advice from someone who regularly said they were the shield that guarded the realms of men, even if Sarah did understand that reference.

After the third morning in a row waking up on the couch with Natasha curled up to her, Sarah was ready to admit she had a problem. She was Captain America, for Christ’s sake, she had fought Nazis and survived being frozen for decades, she could manage to ask a beautiful woman out on a date. Besides, it would definitely be easier than in the forties.

She cornered Peter as he was on his way out one night, already suited up and ready to launch himself from a window. “Hey, can I ask you something?” she asked.

Peter froze and turned to her as he stood on the edge of the window. “Sure, what’s going on?”

Sarah had no idea how to broach the subject. “Do you know if Natasha has a favorite restaurant in the city?” she finally asked.

Peter gaped at her. He jumped back inside the room and took a few steps towards her. “Is this going where I think this is going?” he asked suspiciously. Despite his mask, Sarah could clearly see how surprised he was.

“I guess so-” Sarah answered hesitantly.

“Look, Sarah,” Peter said. “I feel I really should tell you something first. See, Natasha is in a very vulnerable state right now. She’s been through a lot, and I’m not just talking about Afghanistan or Hill trying to take her suits away. She’s been screwed over and over by the people closest to her and this has to stop. So if you even think about hurting her, I’ll come after you… and that won’t be pretty… because you’re huge, and Captain America, and you’ll probably crush me- Man, I know that serum is something else but jeez,” he exclaimed, patting Sarah’s biceps.

Sarah smiled warmly. “Thank you, Peter.”

The boy frowned. “That’s not the answer I was expecting. What for?” he asked.

“Watching over her.”

Peter nodded. “That’s my job,” he said solemnly. “Now, you should take her to that Italian restaurant on Bleecker Street,” he suggested before jumping out the window and disappearing into the night.

Now that Sarah had taken the first step, she felt more confident about approaching Natasha. She made her way to the living room where she found the woman smirking, her eyes on the TV screen.

She turned to Sarah. “I thought you said you were going to stop talking to the press,” she simply said.

“Oh no-” Sarah said quietly before glancing at the television. She knew what all this was about.

“Why don’t you enter the presidential race?”

She had been so worried about asking Natasha out that she had forgotten about her small conversation with the press that day. They had cornered her after her morning run, asking her about Osborn and the candidates in the next presidential elections that were still months away!

Sarah gaped at the screen and saw herself shaking her head. “I’m flattered people think I could lead this great country but the truth is I can’t. I- I can’t represent the American government. No. I must represent the American people. And I could never do that from the Oval Office.”

Her face disappeared from the screen, replaced by the news anchor. “You’ve heard her,” the woman on TV said. “Captain America doesn’t think the government represents the American people. I can’t say I disagree.”

Sarah’s eyes went wide. “That’s not what I meant!” she exclaimed.

Natasha giggled. “Well that’s what it sounded like.”

Sarah sighed. “Do you want to have dinner with me?” she asked suddenly.

Natasha turned to her and shrugged. “Sure. We have dinner together almost every night anyway, right? I’m going to check on Jarvis.”

Sarah snorted. That was not what she had meant either. “No, I mean do you want to go out?”

“Now?”

“I was thinking Friday, Italian, maybe?”

How could she manage to talk down criminals and not manage to ask Natasha out was beyond her.

“Are you-” Natasha started. “No, you can’t be.”

“I’m trying to ask you out on a date, Tasha.”

“Yeah, that's what I thought was happening,” Natasha mumbled.

Sarah froze. “I’m sorry,” she said at once. Shit. If that were a S.H.I.E.L.D. mission, she would be asking for an extraction right now. “I shouldn’t have. It's just that I-”

Natasha lifted a hand to stop her. “No, you’re good. I'm the one fucking up right now. I’d love to go out with you,” she said with a smile.

Sarah looked at her in surprise. “Wait, really?”

Natasha gave her a look. “Sarah, come on,” she simply said.

Her evening was definitely looking up.

 

The next day, as Sarah had suspected, Hill ripped her a new one about talking to the press – again – and sent her fill out paperwork for the rest of the day. Sarah was getting frustrated. She snapped her second pen of the day.

“Are you okay?” Daisy asked, looking concerned.

“I’m fine,” Sarah snapped.

“You’ve got ink running down your arm,” Daisy pointed out.

Sarah lifted her arm. Ink was indeed running down her wrist to her elbow. “Shit. Fucking shit,” she exclaimed. “Exactly what I needed today.”

“Seriously, are you okay?”

Sarah sighed. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just had other plans than dealing with Hill’s paperwork tonight.”

Sarah glanced at the clock. She still had a little time.

Daisy snorted. “What, do you have a hot date or something?”

“Yeah, actually I do,” Sarah answered.

“Wait, what?” Daisy exclaimed, jumping on her feet. “What are you still doing here then! Get up! Get out of here!”

“But Hill…” Sarah said as Daisy pushed her towards the door.

“I’ll deal with Hill. Just go!”

 

Going on a date with Natasha was surprisingly like every other night at home. Sarah’s nervousness had simply disappeared as soon as she had seen that the other woman still had grease under her nails.

“You were running late so I worked on my car for a bit,” Natasha said.

“As long as you don’t end up in the hospital again,” Sarah teased.

“Hey,” Natasha exclaimed. She glared but Sarah knew she was trying not to smile.

Their date was going surprisingly well. Sarah should have known better. They were about to start eating when Spider-Man and Ms. Marvel crashed through the window of the restaurant, sending glass everywhere and nearly blinding Natasha as well as the waiter bringing their plates.

“Hi guys,” Peter exclaimed cheerfully. “Don’t mind us, we’re only passing through.”

“Spidey,” Kamala exclaimed. “Watch out!” she warned as a car was shot right through the broken window.

Peter grabbed the car as if it weighted nothing while Kamala’s hands grew and made their way to the three goons standing outside.

Sarah saw Natasha grab her bag and rummage through it. If only Sarah had taken her shield!

“Hey, Cap, catch!” Natasha exclaimed.

Sarah lifted her hands on instinct and caught a small device resembling a bracelet. Natasha mimicked putting it on. When Sarah did, the bracelet immediately turned into a shield. Her shield. It was transparent, and looked like a hologram but was still strong enough to stop the bullets the men were shooting at her.

“Get out of here,” she told Natasha.

She heard the other woman snort and knew Natasha would simply ignore Sarah’s plea to get to safety. Damn that woman’s bravery. In truth, that was one of the reasons Sarah liked the woman so much.

“Get those people out,” she said and Natasha nodded before running to the staff and clients hiding behind the counter.

“Let’s go, people,” Natasha yelled over the sound of an energy blast.

“Where do they even get this stuff?” Spider-Man exclaimed in disbelief.

“The black market?” Ms. Marvel suggested.

“That was a rhetorical question!”

Since she couldn’t throw her shield at them, Sarah used the next best thing and threw a table at the group. She managed to knock out one of the men. Spider-Man wrapped another one in his web and Ms. Marvel grabbed the last one in her giant hand before knocking him out with her other – normal-sized – hand.

“That’s for ruining their date, jerk!” the girl exclaimed.

Sarah made sure all three bad guys were out before retrieving her bag from under a pile of broken glass and grabbing her cell.

“I’m calling Daisy,” she told the younger heroes. “S.H.I.E.L.D. will deal with them. You guys should go before they get here.”

“Are you sure-” Peter asked.

“Yeah, I’ll handle it. Thanks for the assist.”

Peter’s mask really did nothing to conceal his facial expressions. He looked at her dejectedly. Sarah could no tell if he was disappointed she did not ask him to stay or disappointed her date with Natasha had gone to hell.

“Come on, Spidey,” Kamala told him, grabbing his arm. “She’s right, we should go.”

Sarah watched them go; Kamala extended her legs to jump from building to building and Peter followed, swinging his web. Then the woman glanced at Natasha who was trying to calm the civilians down.

When Daisy arrived, she gave Sarah an encouraging smile that made the woman feel even worse about her failed date.

“I guess that makes even more paperwork for us,” Daisy pointed out.

She patted Sarah’s shoulder before walking away as Natasha came to a stop next to her.

“I think they got this handled,” Natasha told her.

Sarah nodded wordlessly. She glanced at Natasha and winced at seeing her trashed dress and the dirt on her face. The night had not gone the way Sarah had hoped. Now Natasha would probably never want to go out with her again.

“So…” Natasha said, clapping her hands together. “That’s out of the way.”

“What do you mean?” Sarah frowned.

“Come on, we were bound to be attacked sooner or later. Trust me, that’s not the first time something like this happens.”

That made Sarah smile. “What do you think we should do then?”

The brunette took a few seconds to think about their options. “Hot dogs?” she finally suggested. “I know a place. Unless you want to go back to the mansion, of course,” she added as an afterthought.

“No,” Sarah exclaimed at once. Natasha raised her eyebrows in amusement but remained silent. “I mean- Lead the way.”

Sarah followed the other woman through the crowded streets of New York. What a sight the two of them must have made, Sarah thought as a man in a three-piece suit walked past them. Sarah was more and more aware of her disheveled appearance; her hair was a mess and her dress was torn in several places. It was a miracle her shoes were still in one piece. Natasha was no better, of course. However, Sarah realized that the other woman still looked breathtakingly beautiful despite the pieces of concrete stuck in her brown hair.

Sarah could not help the sigh that escaped her and Natasha bumped their shoulders, smiling at her.

“Ah, there it is,” Natasha exclaimed with a flourish. “The best hot dogs in the city,” she added, pointing at the truck in front of them.

Natasha paid for the both of them despite Sarah’s protests and the two women sat down on a bench nearby. Some people walking by seemed to recognize them but walked away without saying a word.

“So, how often do you end up fighting in fancy dresses?” Sarah asked curiously.

Natasha snorted. “That happened quite often actually. The bad guys seem to think that catching me when I’m out of the suit will somewhat make it easier for them.”

“Seems logical,” Sarah nodded. “That must really suck for you, though.”

“My suit was never really far away,” Natasha explained. She shoved the last of her hot dog in her mouth and extended her arms towards Sarah. “I’ve got chips in my wrists,” she said. “I used them to call the suit, it was very efficient.”

Sarah lightly brushed her fingers against Natasha’s pale skin. She could feel a slight bump where the chips were located.

“You still have them,” Sarah noted.

Natasha shrugged. “Frankly, getting them out was not worth the trouble.”

“Or… maybe you’re not done being Iron Woman just yet,” Sarah suggested in a gentle voice.

Natasha stared at her. “I kind of like that you think so highly of me,” she smirked. “It’s great for my ego.”

“Natasha…” Sarah scolded gently.

“I’m not as good as you think I am.”

Sarah’s hands slowly slid along Natasha’s wrist to grab the woman’s hands.

“Tell me about the sorry bastards who thought it’d be a good idea to attack you,” Sarah said, trying to change the subject.

Sarah was unfortunately well aware of Natasha’s self-worth issues by now and knew that a direct approach would only scare Natasha away.

Natasha glanced at their intertwined hands. “Well, there was one time when A.I.M. tried to abduct me while I was in Monaco,” Natasha said hesitantly.

“Really?”

“Yeah, they almost made it too, you know. I had too much to drink at the party that night and they apparently had been there the whole time; watching me, waiting. I was making it easier for them without even realizing it.”

“Tasha…”

Natasha slowly withdrew her hands from Sarah’s grip and crossed them over her lap. “I needed some air after drinking so much; so I went outside. They followed me out. I can’t really remember where Happy was. I had asked him to wait in the car, I think. Anyway, I only had one gauntlet with me. I had a watch that turned into a gauntlet,” she explained as an afterthought.

“Sounds impressive,” Sarah managed to say in a strangled voice.

Natasha gave her a self-depreciating smile. “Anyway, I used the repulsor to defend myself but my aim was a bit off, as you can imagine. I knocked out a lamppost. It fell on a nearby car and I…”

“Natasha…”

“I could have killed someone,” Natasha added in a hoarse voice. “I hurt people that night.”

“When was it?”

“Two years ago.”

“That’s when you stopped drinking?”

Natasha shook her head slowly, looking away. “I couldn’t be Iron Woman anymore. It made me realize that in the end I was doing more harm than good. I destroyed the suits before S.H.I.E.L.D. could get their hands on them. It almost killed me. I guess I wanted to die. I thought that if I couldn’t be Iron Woman, then I had no reason to live anymore,” she croaked. “It took me a long time to get back on my feet. That’s why I know I’ll never be Iron Woman again.”

Sarah nodded wordlessly. She wished she could have comforted Natasha but she did not know how.

“Look,” Natasha went on. “I’m not a good person. I’m not,” she said curtly, seeing Sarah frowning. “I need you to know that now, before we– if you want to take things further between us.”

“Thank you for trusting me,” Sarah said wholeheartedly. “Natasha, I like you. I’d like to get to know you better.”

Natasha shook her head in disbelief. “Up until the point you realize it’s too much– that _I’m_ too much. Trust me, you wouldn’t be the first.”

Sarah closed her fist, trying to fight off the sudden wave of anger. She was not angry with Natasha, of course. She resented whatever had happened to make Natasha feel so unworthy of being loved.

“You trust me, right?” Sarah asked. She waited for Natasha to nod. “So trust me with this. Can you do that?” she asked gently.

Natasha nodded once more. Then she said, “That wasn’t really first date material, was it?”

Sarah chuckled. “I never really went on a date before so I wouldn’t know,” she said. Natasha stared at her. “Guys weren’t exactly interested in me. Or even if they were, I’d soon realize that they were simply looking for a challenge. Apparently I was playing hard to get.”

“They were being douchbags,” Natasha stated.

“Maybe. And, well, women weren’t exactly an option either at the time.”

“Next time we’ll do something fun, okay?” Natasha said.

Sarah smiled at her. “Do you want to catch a movie or something?” she asked. “I don’t feel like going back right away.”

“Sure! Come on, Rogers,” Natasha patted Sarah’s leg. “We’ll get popcorn and everything.”

Sarah got up and offered Natasha her hand.

“And, Natasha?” Sarah said seriously.

“Yes?”

“I’m paying this time,” Sarah stated.

Natasha laughed in surprise.

 

Dating Natasha turned out to be the best thing that had ever happened to Sarah. Nothing had really changed between the two of them; they would spend time together at the mansion, hit the gym, try to keep Peter, Kamala and Cassie out of trouble, go on dates and kiss. They were kissing a lot. Like Sarah had suspected, once Natasha let her guard down, she gave everything she had.

Daisy had stopped pestering her about asking Natasha out only to get really involved in the development of their relationship, going as far as giving Sarah little pieces of advice here and there. That was sweet of her of course but Sarah still had the hope to get her team to act like professionals, not highschoolers on a field trip.

Hill on the other hand was not thrilled by that new development and seemed to trust Sarah even less than before. Sarah had realized down the line that S.H.I.E.L.D. was not as transparent as Hill pretended. Sarah was getting sick of the secrecy and sick of Hill keeping her away from Bucky.

Sarah had thought about asking Romanoff and Wilson about the Winter Soldier. Wilson would be easy enough to crack; he seemed like a genuinely nice and caring person. Romanoff on the other hand was a professional spy. Her secrets had secrets and Sarah doubted she would get anything from her without Hill’s approval.

Hill had sent Sarah’s team on another goose chase – most probably to keep her occupied. At least, that was what it felt like to Sarah.

S.H.I.E.L.D. had managed to get some Intel from Hammer and had gathered a few names linked to A.I.M.’s network. They had also learnt that someone else had been trying to recruit him, someone who had sent the Winter Soldier after him. As soon as Coulson had said “Hydra”, Sarah had lost her composure. Even decades later, Hydra was still alive and kicking, that was more than Sarah could bear.

Daisy had entered all the information they had gathered in the S.H.I.E.L.D. database in the hope they would get a clearer idea of whom they were up against. Sarah stared at the screen as the computer processed the data. Suddenly, a picture appeared on the screen.

“I’ve seen her before,” Sarah suddenly realized.

The red-haired woman on screen had been in Natasha’s office a few weeks earlier as Sarah had come by to get Natasha after work so that the two of them could have dinner together.

“Fuck,” she exclaimed before grabbing her phone and scrolling through her contact list hurriedly.

“What? Where?” Daisy asked.

“Come on, pick up,” Sarah said under her breath. “Pick up, pick up. Dammit.”

“Cap, what’s going on?” Jessica asked.

“Her name is Sinthea,” Sarah informed them, pressing her phone even closer to her ear. “I think she’s been targeting Natasha all along.”


	8. Sins of the Father

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here’s the last chapter of the main story. I’ll probably post one or two more chapters as One-Shots later on to wrap things up.

Sinthea needed Natasha to do something, that much was clear. The woman had however remained frustratingly vague about her ultimate goal.

“I was trying to recruit Justin Hammer but S.H.I.E.L.D. got their hands on him first,” she said.

“Hammer?” Natasha said in disbelief. “You really lowered your standards here.”

“He as an easy target,” Sin admitted. “Easier to manipulate. That made up for the lack of brain cells.”

“Easier than me is what you mean.”

Sin gave her a sweet smile that chilled Natasha to the bone.

“I don’t expect you to cooperate,” the red-haired woman said.

“Yeah, you got that right.”

Natasha received a fist to the face for her trouble.

 

“Natasha! Natasha!”

Natasha groaned in pain. That was Peter’s voice, she was sure of it. What was he doing here? Where was even here? For the life of her, Natasha could not remember where she was. All she knew was that Peter was in danger and she could not save him.

“You can save him,” a voice whispered in her ear. “You can save everyone. You just need to do what you’re told.”

Natasha frowned. The fog in her mind started to clear and a face came out of the shadow at last.

“You,” she spat. “You’re working for Sin.”

“I am,” Faustus said, smiling. He took a few steps towards Natasha and the woman flinched. “Don’t try to put up a brave front on my account,” the man said. “I can see inside your head, remember? There’s no use trying to lie to me.”

“What did you do to Peter?” Natasha asked.

The woman had the feeling Peter had just been part of Faustus’ latest hallucination but she could not know for sure. If there was even the tiniest of chance that they got to the boy, then…

“Cooperate and you’ll know,” Sin cut in from the other side of the room. The woman was leaning casually against a wall, arms crossed, and seemed to be enjoying the show tremendously. “Are you done yet?” she asked Faustus.

The man glared. “These things take time. She’s upped her defenses since the last time.”

“Well, we’ll need to up our game then,” Sin purred. She pushed herself off the wall and slowly walked to Natasha before crouching in front of her. “You care about that kid, right? Peter, was it?” The woman laughed. “I thought you would have understood by now, you don’t get to care about anyone in this life. Anyone who comes close to you ends up dead. Don’t you get it?”

“Fuck you,” Natasha growled, trying to block off the sound of Sin’s voice.

Natasha’s phone went off again. She could not tell if that was real or part of another hallucination.

Sinthea glanced down at Natasha’s phone and shook her head disapprovingly. “Even Captain America won’t be able to save you this time,” she declared.

Natasha took a deep breath. “Shit, Sinthea, why are you doing this?” she asked, trying to break loose of the ropes binding her wrists.

“Because I need your help and you wouldn’t have given it willingly,” the red-haired woman explained, blowing a pink bubble gum distractingly.

“You got that right,” Natasha mumbled.

Sinthea dropped the phone on the floor and smashed it under her boot. “There. They won’t be able to locate us now,” she pointed out. “So, here’s what we’re going to do, Stark. You’re going to make a new body for my father.”

Natasha stilled and glanced up. “You know I’m a mechanic, right? Not a surgeon,” she noted.

Sinthea laughed. “I know that, darling. I want you do build an android and upload my father’s mind in it.”

“You’re crazy, lady,” Natasha said simply. “And you,” she said, turning to Faustus, “you’re even crazier than I thought. You know she’ll get rid of you as soon as she gets what she wants, right?”

Faustus simply rolled his eyes at her.

“Come on,” Sinthea said softly. “I know you can do it. You did it before,” she reminded Natasha. “Ultron was a work of art, anybody that says otherwise is a fool.”

“Ultron was a monster,” Natasha countered, glaring at her. “He killed people.”

Sinthea shook her head slowly. “He was perfect,” she declared. “So, will you do it?” she asked.

“Fuck you.”

“I was hoping you’d say that,” Sinthea said before crashing her boot into Natasha’s face.

 

Natasha did not know how much time had passed since Sin had kidnaped her. It could have been days or mere hours. Natasha had lost track of time and of reality. Faustus was still playing tricks with her mind and Natasha felt her control slipping a little bit more with each new try. She would not be able to hold him off much longer.

The only thing she felt was pain, anger and despair. Sin enjoyed playing with her, Natasha was well aware of it. The woman was enjoying every minute of torturing Natasha, trying to determine just how much pain Natasha could endure before passing out and stopping before Natasha could lose consciousness and escape for a few moments.

Natasha closed her eyes a moment. She tried to talk but the words got stuck into her throat as she chocked on her own blood. Sin grabbed the back of her head and made her look up.

“Yeah, what is it, darling?” the woman asked sweetly. “I can’t hear you.”

“Kill me,” Natasha whispered hoarsely.

“I can’t hear you,” Sin said again, yanking at Natasha’s hair.

“Kill me,” Natasha said, louder. “I won’t give you what you want. I’ll- I’ll never give you what you want.”

“Kill you?” Sin asked in disbelief. “No, no, darling. See, I’m just getting started,” she told Natasha, tightening her grip on Natasha’s hair. “By the time I’m through with you, you’ll do exactly what I tell you to do.”

“Never.”

Sin yelled furiously and violently knocked Natasha’s head against the wall. Natasha cried in pain. She heard shooting outside the room and people yelling. Another trick, she thought.

Behind the haze, Natasha felt someone gently touch her bruised face. “Natasha?” a voice called. It sounded so far away. “Natasha? Come on, sweetheart, talk to me.”

Faustus is just playing with you, she reminded herself.

“Sarah?” Natasha managed to say in a raspy voice, hoping that this was real.

“I’m here. Come on, you’re safe now,” Sarah whispered as she cut Natasha loose.

Natasha leant forward and rested her head against Sarah’s chest. Sarah wrapped her arms around Natasha tightly.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get here,” Sarah whispered in her ear. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Natasha said under her breath, words slurring together. “I knew you’d come.”

Natasha had never been so glad to see S.H.I.E.L.D. agents coming in guns blazing. The woman let Sarah lead her to the paramedic team and did not put up much of a fight when they tried to stick an IV in her arm. She knew she must have looked like crap. She felt like it at least. Sarah held her hand through it all, ignoring Hill’s question – what was the woman even doing here? – and stayed close to Natasha even after Faustus and Sin disappeared into a S.H.I.E.L.D. SUV.

“How did you find me?” Natasha asked.

Sarah looked at her and Natasha finally registered how worried the other woman looked. She had dark circles under her eyes and her hair was a mess. She looked a mess and Natasha realized that that must have been because of her.

“We were following a lead on Hydra, they’ve been more active lately and we were trying to find their new leader.”

“Sin,” Natasha supplied. “Red Skull’s long lost daughter. Figures.”

Sarah nodded. “When I saw her face on the screen I just… I remembered seeing her in your office that day and I finally put the pieces together. She was after you. I’m sorry, I should have understood earlier. I should have stopped her.”

Natasha shook her head. She lifted her hand slowly and rested it on Sarah’s cheek. “Hey, no, it’s not your fault. Come on, how could you have known? I didn’t even know what was going on. If anything, I should have realized what her intensions were all along.”

“How could you have known?” Sarah countered.

Natasha shrugged. “I thought this part of my life was over,” she said. “The kidnapping, trying to make me do things I don’t want to do. Guess I was wrong.”

Sarah remained silent. “Come on, I’ll take you home. Peter’s been worried sick. He wanted to come with us.”

Natasha’s eyes went wide. “Peter! Is he okay?” she asked suddenly.

Sarah looked at her, surprised. “He’s fine, he’s at the mansion.”

Natasha sighed in relief. “Good. That’s good,” she whispered. “Let’s go home.”

 

Even though Sarah had assured her Peter was safe, Natasha only felt she could truly relax after seeing him safe and sound. The boy was waiting for her at the mansion, practically climbing up the walls with worry. He ran to her and jumped in her arms as soon as he saw her.

“Don’t do that again,” was all he said, burring his face in her neck.

Natasha frowned and wrapped her arms around him. She could swear the kid was crying and trying to hide it.

“She didn’t give me much of a choice, you know,” she said.

Peter snorted. “I’m glad you’re home,” he mumbled finally.

“I’m glad to be home too.”

 

Pepper had basically forbade Natasha to come into the office for at least a week, saying Natasha needed time to regroup and deal with what had happened. That was sweet of her but Natasha’s way of dealing was usually burying herself into her work. Not the healthiest thing to do, she was well aware, but it was her only way of copping. Natasha could not stay idle for long, that was simply not in her nature.

The woman finally dislodged the cat Peter had found and that had taken the habit of napping on her lap, ignoring his protests. “You know you can’t come with me to the workshop,” she told the cat. “I’ll be back soon.”

Natasha worked for three days straight, which could not have happened if Sarah had not been away on an assignment. Jarvis came three times a day to bring her food and remind her that she might need a shower but Natasha ignored his advice and barely touched the food. She had to focus on her work.

Natasha had always hated feeling helpless. When she had truly giving up on Iron Woman, she had thought she could have a normal life, but she knew now that she simply could never have a normal life. That was not in the cards for her. She had too many enemies who all thought they would be the one to break her and make her work for them. She could not afford to be helpless. She would not let them use her like that ever again.

 

When Natasha made her way out of the workshop three days later, she found Cassie and Peter in the living room, talking quietly.

“Hey, you’re back!” Cassie exclaimed.

“I haven’t gone anywhere.”

“You were in your workshop for three whole days,” Cassie reminded her. “Do you even know what day of the week it is? When was the last time you took a shower?”

“Gee thanks, Cassie. What are you guys doing?”

“Nothing. Watching the news,” Peter shrugged.

“You guys take too much interest in current affairs for teenagers,” Natasha pointed out.

“Comes with the job,” Cassie explained.

Natasha glanced at her. “I hope both for your sake and mine that you’re not talking about superheroing,” she warned the girl.

“Why not?” Cassie said. “Look, I-”

“… breaking news from New York where we can see Captain America as a bridge collapses after an attack…”

Natasha turned her attention to the screen immediately.

“…our correspondent Samantha, how are things looking there, Samantha?”

“S.H.I.E.LD. agents are already on the scene, conduction the evacuation of the bridge as you can see behind me. Captain America seems to be doing all she can to prevent a bus from plummeting, this is horrifying, we don’t know how much more time she will…”

Natasha swore loudly.

Peter jumped on his feet. “I have to go,” he exclaimed before rushing out of the room.

“I’m going too,” Natasha added, turning to Cassie.

“I guess I’ll just wait here then…” the girl mumbled as Natasha ran out of the mansion.

Natasha had no idea if the suit she had been working on would work on the first try but she could not afford to wait. She needed to go out there and help now that she could.

 

Natasha had almost forgotten what flying felt like. She pushed the suit more than she should have on a first try but that did not matter. Sarah needed her help and Natasha would not let her down.

Natasha flew over the bridge, taking in the situation. Most of the civilians had been evacuated already, S.H.I.E.L.D. agents were securing the scene and Sarah… Sarah was at the end of the bridge, holding a city bus, preventing it from plummeting to the ground.

“Need any help?” Natasha said as she flew by the other woman.

She saw Sarah’s surprised look but decided to ignore it, focusing instead on the mission at hand. Natasha grabbed the front of the bus and pushed it backwards until it was safely back on the bridge.

“There you go folks,” she said as she yanked the door open. “Thank you for travelling with our company.”

Natasha did not wait around for S.H.I.E.L.D. agents or the media to start questioning her. She saw Spider-Man helping a family out of their car. Everything seemed under control. She took a deep breath and flew away.

 

Natasha knew she had a lot of explaining to do.

“You could have told me, you know,” Sarah said, entering the workshop a few hours later.

“Look, if you’re here to tell me I shouldn’t have…” Natasha started without turning around.

“That’s not why I’m here,” Sarah said. “I was… surprised. You didn’t tell me what you were planning.”

“I didn’t even know what I was planning until I started working on the suit,” Natasha admitted.

Sarah took a few steps forward. “Show me,” she said quietly.

Natasha took a step back and focused on the suit, calling it to her in a way. She saw Sarah’s eyes widen as the gold and red suit slowly formed over her skin. She stopped it before it could form the helmet as well.

“Natasha,” Sarah breathed out, taking a step towards her. “It’s amazing,” she finally said, looking at her in wonder. “How did you manage to-”

“Nanotech,” Natasha explained. “I won’t have to carry a suitcase around anymore. All I need is to think about it and the suit appears. I’d understand if this changes things,” she said quietly.

Sarah frowned. “Why would it change anything?”

“I wasn’t Iron Woman anymore when we started dating. I’d understand if you wanted to break things off.”

“This is about Pepper,” Sarah pointed out.

“Maybe- Probably,” Natasha acknowledged. She dropped her gaze to the floor and made the suit disappear.

Sarah gently put her hands on Natasha’s shoulders. “Nat, I don’t know what happened between you and Pepper but I won’t leave you because of the suit, you need to understand that.”

Natasha shook her head. “Pepper and I-” she started. “There was a time when we thought maybe- you know. But I was so focused on being Iron Woman and leading the Avengers that I ended up neglecting a whole lot of things in my life. I couldn’t think straight, I kept putting myself in danger and Pepper was worried sick about me. She already had to deal with Natasha Stark, I couldn’t ask her to deal with Iron Woman too.”

“But they’re not two separate people,” Sarah underlined, looking confused. “They’re both you. You are Iron Woman.”

Natasha shook her head slowly. “I’m really not,” she said with a self-depreciating smile. “Iron Woman is a hero. Me, I’m just the CEO of Stark Industries, directly responsible for the death of countless people.”

“You’re worth so much more than you realize, Natasha,” Sarah said quietly. “Just by being yourself. You don’t need to prove your worth to anyone, least of all me. You’re a good person. And you deserve someone who supports you, no matter what.” Natasha shook her head in disbelief. “I won’t ever make you choose between being with me and being Iron Woman, I can promise you that.”

Natasha nodded wordlessly, trying to ignore the lump in her throat.

“Thanks, by the way,” Sarah added after a moment. “I really needed the back up.”

Natasha smiled. “Anytime.”

 

The end (for now)


End file.
